Empty Lies and Promises - Comments

Contest Comment:
This story was very interesting. I wasn't expecting their relationship. Some of your sentences were oddly worded and you had a few grammatical errors, but otherwise everything was good.
It seemed to me that the first two chapters were rushed and then when the third chapter came in, it was like you put every ounce of effort into that sex scene then into anything else.
Also the way you talked about 'the accident' made it seem like the reader already knew about what happened in the accident.
Anyway please check the contest thread on April 29 to see if you've won.

This is really cute c: It's definitely the kind of story that could rip my heart in half. I love how the story starts, kind of weird but really cute in a way. Nice imagery c: I think it starts really well because it doesn’t start in a place of direct action, but it doesn’t start before the action either. It starts with a very unusual first scene, but really sets the story.

This is really cute c: It's definitely the kind of story that could rip my heart in half. I love how the story starts, kind of weird but really cute in a way. Nice imagery c:

For such a short excerpt, this was quite the intriguing piece. And I loved it.

Great entry and best of luck in the contest!

Comment swap brought me to another amazing story. I wish that it was longer! I didn't really know what was going on at first then, BAM! It made sense that she was interrupting him. Haha that part made me laugh out loud. Again, I really do wish this was longer. It was fascinating and well written. :)

Whoa, this was so great. Short and intriguing. Btw I really love your layout, it's the first thing that caught my eye :) and your discriptions and portrayal of emotions is amazing. I wish this was longer :D

Woah that was so short but so intense. I love how you described everything, you described the sex in a classy way and I liked that. I like the last bit what Logan said. I wish it was longer though! But I absolutely loved this C:

Puhaha at first I thought that they were having sex but then it turns out he's masturbating and she's interrupting him... clever c: I like how it starts off with Logan's perspective and then shifts towards Nissa's and, I don't know how you do it but, even if you didn't say whose perspective it was, I'd still be able to tell. You switch voices really well ^^ and the last bit, where you switched back to Logan's perspective was just a really good ending :D I liked it!

wow, i really loved this. i expected just to read the first chapter or so, but as soon as i started it, i just didn't want to stop. it really just captured every little part of my attention, and i'm so glad i took the time to read it. there were a couple of moments that i thought needed looking over a little, but it was nothing major, nothing spoilt the story for me. it was wonderful. <3

I love your descriptions and the characters. You showed many sides of both of them without making it seem like different people/personalities altogether.

There were some awkwardly worded sentences that made me pause to grasp what you were trying to write, but I was captivated enough by the story that it didn't get in the way too much.

Mostly, I adore the amount of emotion you wrote. I think you displayed just about every emotion in the spectrum and each one was raw and perfect. The ending was cute too, though I was still left with some questions, I can't say it wasn't a good read. <3

Hmm... Comment Swap sent me here. I like the way you write. And it's definitely an interesting concept. The descriptions are wonderful and the emotion is pretty good. Your transitions make the story flow well and their relationship definitely pulls at your heart strings, what with the accident and all. Anyways, yeah. :) Keep on writing!

Hmm... Comment Swap sent me here. I like the way you write. And it's definitely an interesting concept. The descriptions are wonderful and the emotion is pretty good. Your transitions make the story flow well and their relationship definitely pulls at your heart strings, what with the accident and all. Anyways, yeah. :) Keep on writing!

Like the layout:) I also like how you wrote how each character was feeling in each scene with a good description. You portrayed their relationship nicely and it flowed very easily. The title seems to fit in with the story plot and it gives it a good meaning. Overall, I think this is a great story :)

I seriously just want to marry this story.

I really like the layout. It's nice on the eyes and it suits the story well. I also really like the story. Its realistic and had a nice feel to it. You detailed this story so beautifully. I can tell you enjoy writing things like this(: I also love the title. Its nice and goes with the story.
Last I could say is keep writing and never let anybody ever tell you different.

I love this, it was nice to read and the concept had a good vibe.

1-10
8.8 (:

You're gonna give me a heart attack
If you continue like that!
Damn, woman!
Love it <3

This was amazing I have to say, love the obstacle relationship you have because of the accident. I'm sure you know I'm honored that you dedicated chapter three to me. I'm sure you know i enjoyed it, great work as usual love.