Sanglante Miroir - Comments

Wow, talk about spooky. It was amazing in how such few words you got so much emotion and depth into your work. The ending really left me hanging! I don't know if you plan to continue, but I think you definitely could go farther with it. You're a very talented writer :)

Okay, the beginning of this was absolutely terrifying. First she was counting which is creepy enough already, and then when you mentioned the knife, I got really worried. This girl is the creepiest thing ever, especially with the way she's just tossing the lady around and stabbing her. Stabbing someone forty times is so many times! I really liked the ending though, and I was not expecting that at all! It wasn't just a senseless murder like I thought, and I liked the depth that that twist added. This was a great story and I really enjoyed reading it!

Personally, I thought the font was a tiny bit too small. The first sentence - oh my god. I love it. It absolutely draws you right into the story and the rest of the story is just as good! You're a very talented writer.

Honestly, the main character reminds me of Helena Bonham Carter, and a mix of all the creepy women she's ever played, like Bellatrix and that girl from Sweeny Todd, so well done, i was thoroughly creeped out! You totally nailed a psychopath's thought process and mannerisms!

I like the story, it's great.

It doesn't help my imagination that I'm reading this in the dark, at night, alone in my dorm room. Hm.

First off, that's a really neat layout you have there. The banner tells me that you know, shit's about to happen, and the dark background confirms that. Again, not helping that I'm reading this alone in my room, at night.

I'm going to be honest though. I had to read the story on default layout. The font seems just a tad bit too small, even though it meshes perfectly with the background. That's just a nit pick though.

Hm. It doesn't help that I've just had dinner too, apparently. Gore wasn't something I was expecting when I came here - despite the bloody hand in the banner.

First off, the detail and description fits well. The fact that the protagonist (or the antagonist?) is more concerned with the sleeves of her shirt than the life she's taking seems so very, well, murderously psychotic.

She does this too with the makeup on the woman's face and it gives the story a more realistic feel.

I'm kind of confused though. Psychotic killers usually find some sort of release in their kills. Is the protagonist sexually invested in this particular kill? Or is she killing the woman because she hates her for whatever reason?

Because the details you added - where she stabs the woman's left breast, licks her neck and sits on the victim's pelvis all indicate sexual gratification. Or at least something to that extent. But then, at the end, she's more like - I'm never going to make the same mistake you did. Which confuses me, honestly, because I generally really like stories of psychotic murderers >.>

There are a few mistakes though. Some general issues. Because the victim is a female, and because you haven't really given the protagonist a name, the use of pronouns in referring to them throughout the story is kind of confusing. I had to re-read a few parts a couple of times to understand which "her" you were talking about.

Apart from all that though, I liked the whole metaphorical spin you can put this story. She's murdering herself, as she peers in to her reflection, and it's her self loathing and perhaps self love, that breeds this. You can apply this in a lesser degree to people in the real world, who have so much self hate they can't bear looking at themselves in the mirror.

I don't know if that was the ring you were trying to put to it but it was what I got. Le sigh.

Anyway. This was a good job. You're certainly a talented writer :)

So my comment wasn't long enough -.-

Basically, you're story was well structured, well written and thought through and I didn't have much I could comment on other than the fact that I loved it.

You've managed to capture what I can only assume would be the thought process of a psychopath... But the scary part is that you write it so that the reader can relate.... With a psyco...

If you continue this, I would be so happy. You're writing is great and deserves to be pulished.

Really good. I love the layout it really sets the story. I really like the idea of the story. I really like the main character, the way you've written her is great. I look forward to reading more and descovering who she really is. ~Subscribed

Oh I have so much love for this. The layout is gorgeous and creepy: it immediately attracts the reader to the story. It was short, yet very emotive: you portrayed the deranged manner of the person very well. The way that she would freak out over a mere stain on her sweater added to the un-hinged effect.

“You know this isn’t fun if you won’t talk to me.”

My favourite line out of the whole story. Typical psychopath-line. I adore it.

It held the right amount of psychopathy, but it wasn't overly gory: you found the right balance, and I love you for it

The way she rubbed at her eyelids and licked her neck really freaked me out. You writing is so good, it fits into the psychosis of the character perfectly. I must say I'm a little jealous :c

Oh well. I've recommended this, because It's freaking brilliant. I subscribed too, so I can read it again and again! ::teh:

Damn this is good. I love the layout, it's beautiful. It really gives an eerie affect to the story.
Your writing is beautiful. You really leave us wanting more and leave us asking question. There's so much in such a little word count.
Really good... I don't know if this is a one-shot or not but I'm going to subscribe so when I'm in a certain mood I can read this again. ;)

how old is this girl holding the knife? it seems as if she's not more then twenty. i think from what i have read, i can assume that the girl is either stabbing herself... or her mother. am i correct?
amazing writing by the way.
i remember watching this episode on NCIS where there is a junkie lady... it just kind of reminded me of her.

I forgot to ask about the sleeves!
What was with the rant about sleeves?
I really didn't understand that part ):

Scary that I loved it...
But I did.
It was twisted and beautiful and just... Perfect...

Beautiful layout by the way. It's a very powerful emotional piece- one that I cannot begin to understand. But that's the beauty of it, isn't it? We don't know what lead up to this or what happens next. We don't know about this character who is licking blood and cares more about her new sweater's sleeves than the person she is remembering. I can guess and I can think and I can make up my own story, or I can take it how it is: a dramatic portrait, not of a life being destroyed, but a life driven to desperation.
Great work.

I loved this, the psychological aspects of fighting against your own self, literally killing your own self. You can feel this connection with it, because, truthfully, who doesn't fear the person we will be in the future? Who doesn't ponder about how we'll end up like and whether we'll like ourselves, whether we'd really want to live that far to turn into that?

It's such an emotional piece, so raw and frightening. Such a psychological turmoil of emotions: disappointment in one's self, fear, sadness, anxiety, guilt. So raw and powerful. I loved this. I truly loved this.