One Of A Kind - Comments

  • WillowSunshine

    WillowSunshine (100)

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    33
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    Where to begin? I'm here from comment swap and I am totally in love with this story. I like the mystery behind where she doesnt know anything about her father and other vampires and how her mother didn't just leave her somewhere haha. You write very well and there aren't any grammatical errors. This is a very good start to this story and I hope you do have the time and inspiration to continue with this. It seems thought out very well and even though it's only three chapters you really have me hooked. Maybe she will find her Dad? 8)
    September 24th, 2012 at 09:10pm
  • ShanaeNayy

    ShanaeNayy (100)

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    I have to agree with the first comment, your storyline is very intresting. I think, however; that more background and action would fit well with your story. Tell us more about the world that your character lives in, go more in depth. You did a great job with telling the reader what it was like for her growing up, but it's better to show more so than tell. Maybe some flashback scenes of what happened to her mother that night, or some individual experiences at school. This story has the potential to be really amazing, you've already sparked the intrest; now just fuel the fire.
    August 17th, 2012 at 04:58am
  • tourmaline

    tourmaline (100)

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    Really interesting(: i like it!
    January 4th, 2012 at 05:19am