I Know You - Comments

I'm here as a judge for the Celebrity Fantasy contest.

This was a really interesting story. The formatting with the bolded inner thoughts and the way that you sort of answered them by furthering the story was really cool to read. You described everything is really great detail, but at the same time kept all the big aspects of the story really vague. By the end of the story I felt like I had absolutely no idea what was going on and I really wanted to know more about the entire situation, despite knowing how Natalie was feeling and where she was the whole time.

I like that at the beginning of the story it almost felt like she was in the middle of nowhere, so far away from civilization almost, but she was really just a short walk away from a diner filled with people. Maybe I'm reading into things too much, but it was a really interesting concept to think that someone can be so alone and far away when they're right next to a whole bunch of people.

ANYWAYS, I sort of wish you added more to this so we could know what's going on with Natalie and how Henry found her and why he was helping her, but the suspense is also a really cool way to end the story. Well done!

I don't generally like things like this, where the the story isn't told in the conventional way, but it's written well and I like how it's so fast paced, and how you just throw us right in there. I'm not quite sure exactly what all happened in here. It's kind of vague, especially the summary. The chapter sort of evaded any explanations for what happened at the beginning.

I do like the tone of voice this is in, and how you wrote it. Good job. (:

It was very good. Descriptive but not overly so.
It flowed well, the background was a good fit with the mood.

I like this story, it's very deep and very descriptive. I love the way everything just falls together, like a puzzle everything has a place in this story.

I liked this, it seemed quite interesting, like it was a story but not quite a story at the same time. I like the quote at the top, it seems quite pessimistic and kind of adds to the story. It's not normally something I'd search for, but I love coming across different kind of stories like these.

I'm not a fan of the bolding and italics being used to often, but I liked the idea behind it, the thoughts and whatnot. Also, the fact of having a man be an angel is quite unique as they are normally seen as quite feminine in stories, and you managed to change that up a bit, which I liked. The description was good, but there were some bits where it didn't seem to flow as well. Overall it seemed to fit together in quite a different way though, and it was really interesting :)

Let me just say that you seem to be a talented writer. Great work on this. You should be proud of it because it's quite a read. It's lyrical, a little poetic and yet, has enough substance in it to keep it going. Great job on that.

Honestly though, this isn't what I usually read but that doesn't mean that it's not good. The layout I might find a little too plain but it seems to work.

You're a good writer. Kudos for that! :D

The lyrics are sweet -- I already came up with my own interpretation of what the story will be like; one of my favorite things in Mibba stories is when authors use lyrics in their summaries instead of actual, like, descriptions of the story. Even though a lot of people dislike when others do that. I can appreciate it because I know what it's like to be inspired by a song and want to write a story based off of it, and the link you put is very convenient for me/other readers to give it a listen. I mean, who knows, some of us might like the music we hear and we'll have those who add the links to thank for our new-found gems.

I like the top quote by Henry Rollins, although I'm not sure who he is -- he's the man who sings the song.The links for the photos are also convenient, I think the girl you chose for the lead is very pretty. Her hair is fabulous.

The layout is a bit plain -- something I don't really mind -- but I would recommend you change the background to something more interesting, search for a cute background, perhaps? Only if you want to impress the majority of mibba users who don't seem to be able to look past the cover of something. But like I said, I personally think the layout is just fine, because the lyrics and quote make it more interesting.

Great job. I'm subbing.

I feel like the layout is a little plain for my taste, not to mention there's too much text. A lot of text is fine, but if you're able to structure it well it would look even better.

I love love love the Henry Rollins quote; it's quite beautiful. The lyrics on the bottom seem very interesting too, I'm curious to see here you go with this. I'm subbing to this.

I think that the top picture just doesn't go with everything and it kind of freaked me out how the title was just bolded in the middle, caught between the quote and the lyrics/themes. the quote would be good for summary purposes but for structure everything doesn't seem very, well, pretty. The color is fine and so's the simplicity because it's readable and it does kind of set you up for the feel of the story. I like the quote and poem/lyrics that you used because it just tied in the kind of grayness in the story lol, it just felt kind of sad and depressed. I don't really like that it's an image instead of the actual words and I don't really like the font either. I hope I'm not being too criticizing, just honest opinions c: The lyrics are really intriguing though, it's a nice choice because it makes you think on the interpretation and how it ties in with the story.

So the layout is plain, simple, and appealing. The simplicity of it really just makes me feel mellow.

The 'I know You' thing just kind of weirded me out. I was like, hmmmmm *thinking face*
It felt really real, you know? Like I can understand what it's talking about. It's like, a lot of people end up that way. I've read a lot of people like that.

I do think it looks very inviting. Please let me know when you post this.

I love the lyrics that you're using, and it does set a definite mood of the story, I feel the background is simple and good enough. But there's too much text and not enough structure. I don't think the lyrics should be an image, and if it is, then the text shouldn't be spaced out so. I think it would be a lot better with a picture banner, or no banner at all, simply because there's too much text and it gets a bit messy. I looked at it, and my first thought was "this isn't what I'm looking for". You know? I really don't want to be all missy miserable, but personally I'm not a fan of it.

The text itself is great, I love the quote etc, it's just the actual formatting of it I didn't like. :)