I Don't Know Your Face Anymore - Comments

Comment Swap!

I have to say, it's really interesting just how much variety I've been finding through this comment swap thing. Anyway, I read through this story and found myself a bit distant through it all. I'm not overly fond of the lead, or the cast in its entirety for that matter. There's just nothing there that I can relate to. I don't mean this unkindly, this sort of story just didn't happen to be my cup of tea. Although, it also seems you haven't touched on it in a while? And it seems you really hold this story close to you, so I hope you come back and add to it. Writing should be a release, not a chore. Keep up the good work, carry.me.home.!

That's how I feel about Carve, you know? It's my escape from everything and when someone bashes on a character that is an exact replication of you, it hurts worse than saying "I don't care for the plot" because attacking that character is attacking you. Attacking a plot that is as close to home as this is not right and no matter what anyone says, your writing will always be amazing and you will always be my friend. I will always support your writing and your characters because anything short of that is not right.

As for Tason in this chapter, I really love how it was more from his point of view. It gives us readers a glimpse into his mind and I adore it so much :) It's really a great story and I can relate to it. Great job, love :)

i love it i honestly dont know what else to say. (but i have to make up the character count so shit)
first your layout is cute and easy on the eyes. i love how we slowly find out a little more each time and you leave me wanting to know just a little more.
im subscribing i want to know where you take this :)

Hey!! I only just started reading your story an thinks its wonderful. I really enjoy it, your writing is really easy to understand and portrays things well :) will definitely subscribe

I like the story so far...I mean I guess Faye is a little not my type of character because exactly like CassieScars said, she's insecure and shy while I really admire strong characters but in some way she does fit the image of a more realistic personality. Jace has that attitude that drowns me into his personality. I guess it's a little bit cliché at times but overall the story is good and I like your style of writing. :)I'm really curious what will happen next

First off I adore your layout. and I mean ADOOORE! It's amazing.
However, there are a few things I'd like to advice you on :)
Now feel free to ignore me, because I aint no professional and I'm just telling you what I personally like in novels.
So I read chapter three and it might have changed already and if it has I'm so fucking sorry!

Faye! She's a cutie... But she doesn't quite... Fit, ya know? I mean she's shy and completely insecure, but she straight out tells a flirting teen that she has troubles with new people? It just doesn't fit ):

Jace however, is progressing so well. I just wanted to reach into my imagination ang give him a giaaaaant hug.

I actually really love your plot, so I'll probably read the entire thing later and if my opinion has changed I will be sure to let you know.

Your writing really pulled me in and I hope you're proud of that :)

kayla! ignore stupid ass holes who think they know every damn thing about writing when in reality they probably do the same damn shit they're bitching at you for. Your story is great no matter what some self conceded bitch says and don't take it to heart. You're a great writer and I'm proud to have co-written with you. People just take satisfaction in tearing people down and making them feel like shit because it makes them feel better about them self's and their shitty ass stories that no one else likes. Don't give up on this because you have many supporters who love this story and friends who support and understand the direction you are taking it in. Your story is amazing and you should be proud :)

I'm rereading this and I love it still. I always will. Just thought you should know. Also...the person below me is a meanie face...

So, comment swap sent me here.
I haven't read beyond the first chapter, but that's how I usually roll when I'm commenting for comment swap. So it's not any reflection on your story or your abilities. You might be building up to something, or you might be hoping to deliver some sort of character development. So, if any critique I give you is on something that through the course of the story changes, or whatever, you can disregard it.

The first thing I feel the need to say, is my overwhelming lack of...affection?...for who I'm assuming will be the male lead. Anything he does in the future, in light of how he's treating her in the first chapter, short of some spectacular feat, will not be enough to make up for the way he's acting now.

You were probably hoping to take his attitude and switch it around. Make him a better man with a change of heart, etc. The simple fact he's being so non-subtle in his insults, makes him come off less as abrasive and more as a straightup dickface.

Pardon mon French.

In light of the behaviors of character, too, it made me dislike her friend Jace-- who is described as "The only person she could trust."-- that he, knowing that Tason was following him, still went straight to her.

This is sort of a double edged thing for me, because on the one end, I love a character with faults. I really, really, don't like characters who are bland because they have to be so ridiculously good at everything. Heaven forbid they ever make a mistake.

On the other hand, however, I find it difficult to sympathize with characters who make mistakes like -that-.

So, I don't know if you were planning to develop them, or if that's the personality you just wanted them to have. If you were planning on having them change (preferably for the better) through the course of the story, please disregard.

On a more technical, and less personal, note...a thing I noticed was a poor imbalance between description and dialogue.

By which I mean there is a LOT of dialogue going on, and too little description. There should always be just a little more description than dialogue.

The problem is, I know so very little about anything I'm supposed to be seeing.

I know that Tason has shaggy dark hair and blue eyes. I know that Jace has sandy blonde hair...and blue eyes....and, of course, that they're twins.

About Faye, however, I know that....she has a red chair.....long, dark blonde, wavy hair....and...that's about it.

Don't get me wrong. It really, really sucks you in. Especially that last line. It's just a bit hard for me to be curious as to why Tason's so upset, when I really just don't like the guy. I don't really care why he's upset, because I just want someone to smack him in the back of his head.

I love it! :D You really are a great writer, and your story kinda sucked me into the storyline. There were some typos but that was seriously counter-acted (is that even a word? :P) by some great detail. Two thumbs up! (they really are raised – you just can’t see them! Mwahahaha!)

P.S. Feel free to be calling me a freak in your head…if you’d like *wiggles eyebrows*

Oh goodness...How I missed you and your stories! I love this chapter, not because of Tason, though i'm super fond of Tason :), but because it's her story. It's showing how even strong girls go through bad stuff and don't stay strong after that.

Great job as always, bro. Keep it coming :)

Oh my god. I can't believe I missed the chapters before 00" ugh I thought mibba was going to inform us once we subscribe on a story but hell no, I waited for amazing stories for long enough until I got to accidentally clicking the subscriptions on my account. I'm really sorry for this, I really have no idea you've updated! T.T But looking at the bright sight, I got to read 3 chapters of this story a day *doing the dancing* :p

Anyhow, seeeee?!!! I knew Tason was a good guy (despite the disgusting fact that he made out in public like that, and gosh what a whore that girl was).. And Jace? Whoa I didn't expect him to turn out to be the bad guy, if I'm not taking it the wrong way. I find the olivers a happy family, and so sweet. Caleb is interesting, olivia is cute, I don't like Jace at the moment, and you know how I love your "prince charming", Tason (I don't even know why still) :p By the way, Olivia Oliver? SCORE *thumbs up* :D :p

And the mystery of the break up is yet to be uncovered eh? God you're killing me. Please update sooooon or I will be killing you. Joke :p update, pretty please? x'0

CHEER UP SLEEPY JEAN! OH WHAT CAN IT MEAN TO A DAYDREAM BELIEVER AND A HOMECOMING QUEEN?

Sorry *ahem*

Anyway, I adore the Oliver family :) Especially Caleb. Muahahaha love me some Jace ^_^

Stupid family issues are stupid...

Comment, subscribe, I bet of you!!!

:'( Sadness! Still love Jace!

Honestly. You. This chapter made me so sad. It was so amazing. I loved it. I love Jace. I want one. I want a boy friend who is that supportive and lovely. As for Tason and his girl, they can shove it up their butts.

I love it! But now I REALLY want to know what happened! Update soon, love. <3

Hee I'll be waiting for the update! Ganbatte kaysaywhattt xD And I don't know why, I kinda like Tason. Oo xD anyway,, i'm glaaaaad you decided to post this original story~ :D I'll be supporting you all the way ^^,

I'd really like to read more of this. Sounds good so far.

I feel so special!!! xDD I get first comment AND a dedication?? Saweet!!!

I look forward to the next chapters :) If you ever need names *wink wink* or ideas *wink wink*, I'd be glad to help :D