Beautifully Broken - Comments

Sorry about the multiple posting. Not sure why that happened.

Comment Swap!
Your layout is lovely, and I do like your style of writing, but it seems it's been a while since you last touched on this story. It's caught my attention, though. I hope you find the inspiration to continue at some point.

Comment Swap!
Your layout is lovely, and I do like your style of writing, but it seems it's been a while since you last touched on this story. It's caught my attention, though. I hope you find the inspiration to continue at some point.

i really like this. i think it's very unique! upload soon :)

Here from comment swap.

I loved the title, as soon as I saw it I just had to read it straight away.

I love your writing style, it's quite different from a lot of users on here, so that was a breath of fresh air.

I think the idea is very good and your use of language too, I did spot a few grammar mistakes, but easily fixed. Well done on this one :)

**Comment Swap**
First off, I love the layout! There is an instant feel for the mood of the story!! It has beautiful graphics as well! For the story, I don't remember seeing any huge grammar errors, which is great! Also I like the style of your writing! Good job!!

Otay so I have no clue if I've commented on this or not but I'm trying to figure what I have to read and I can't remember if I already did this chapter. Welp.
/not going to be a big comment because tbh I'm feeling apathetic today

So I feel like I should know who Laura is but I have no idea how she links in with everything. (I really hope you never mentioned her to me.)

So um Hayden seems like a creeper but also like the stereotypical teenage jerk. Yeah so kudos for that. (Idek why I mentioned this yay bad comments~)

And yeah well Tyler's being kinda weird and it'd be great if you could just cut to the chase and explain why, but from my experience from books and stories, it never happens that way.
/also please don't update too soon because I have like 43869738963 chapters of yours to read don't add another

BUT GR8 STUFF GURL LUV U
/AWKWARD PIGGY AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAY~

Hey, I'm from comment swap :)

So first of all, not only did the title draw me in when I was first presented with your story, but the layout gave the impression of mystery.After reading the first couple of paragraphs and lines I am actually interested.This was brilliant. It was very well written. I love your writing style.Exceptional job, and I look forward to reading your story.

Comment swap brought me here and boy, am I glad!
This is an amazing story!
And I'm definite I haven't ever read something like this one before.
It's absolutely beautiful and I'm absolutely glad that Mibba helped me find you and your story!

How do your write so beautifully? I loved just the little comparisons that you made, a block that won't cement, a jigsaw piece that won't fit. It's just, wow, really.

Blurrrr, I want to read more. I've read all the chapters so far, and I can't wait for more.

From comment swap~

Wow, I already knew this was going to be a beautiful piece from the summary. You have a real way with words. I love that the reason she'll be "leaving this world" is original, compared to others. I really enjoy how the chapters start with letters such as the Mother one when she compares herself to her. Your writing flows beautifully and it really connects to me personally. The way you portray Alexa is really powerful and I enjoy this immensely.

Your writing is eloquent with perfect details. Not too much, but not too little. Perfect balance (:

Once again I'm absolutely in awe. How you manage to write in a way that allows you to relate to Hayley so much is amazing. This is one of maybe tree stories I still continue to read on here because I just can't wait for more.
I think the chapters are coming out fantastic. I'm always left wanting more an I can't wait for the next update!

I've got to say, this is one of the most interesting things I've read on here. Alexa's current state of mind reminds me of how I used to be - and it took a hell of a lot of pulling to get me out of that, so I connect and understand with her current desires.

Your writing flows perfectly, and the descriptive phrases allow the reader to connect easily with the character. :T I feel like there isn't much to critique here because, for the style you're aiming for, it's just so correct. xD I know you think the chapters have been coming out in poor quality, but they really haven't - I envy your style, but it's so cryptic I know there's no way I could replicate it.

I love the characters, from full-of-life Mom to bitchy Hayley, and it's a world I can't wait to immerse myself in again.

Comment Swap.
I read the summary to your story and thought it was a brilliant idea, it's very unique and i was drawn in almost immediately. I can't get over how beautifully it is written and how the emotion came through from your writing. I really don't think i can fault it. i was given your story through comment swap and was immediately drawn in by the Tittle, already expecting great things and i have to say i wasn't disappointing. Beautifully Broken is a fantastically written story and i really enjoyed it. well done.

Comment swap ~

First thing I thought when I saw your story was that the layout is pretty fantastic. Your summary was great, but the line I won't leave you with nothing. bothered me, I feel as if the word anything would be a better replacement instead of nothing.
I love how you can so easily describe what it's like not to fit in. Or to feel as if you don't belong. I'm sure many people have felt this way and you put it into words so easily. I subscribed as soon as I finished reading the first chapter. This is an amazing story, everything flows so well and I hope to see you go far with it!

So my first thought on this story is that it is a wonderful, fantastic idea. It's brilliant. I can't believe that I've never seen anything like this before, and it makes me excited to see where you're going to take it.

Next, I absolutely love your writing style. It's beautiful and its real, and I can't believe that you're calling it crap in almost every author's note that you leave. I think it's amazing. I would kill to be able to write like this - it just flows so well.

I'm instantly subscribing to this, and I hope to see more of it soon. =)

So... yeah.
/late Iggy is the worst person ever but whatevs because ap

Okay, so it is bad that I first thought Hayley was a nice person that Alexa was just being a bitch to? After reading the whole letter she doesn't seem so great, but yeah. First impressions ftw~

Walking into Baywood North Highschool was like walking straight into the gates of Hell. And the overstatement of the year goes to...

I actually really hate Alexa for letting Hayley manipulate her, as it were. C'mon gurl, get away from dat der devil.
/yes I am going to derp my way through this comment
/what of it

Damn, is Hayley one of those annoyingly loud girls that screams conversations to a person standing next to her and stops in the middle of a full hallway to hug someone going the other way? I bet she is.
/headcanon accepted

I grinned through my apathy.
I AM GOING TO SAY THAT ALL EVERY DAY THANK YOU GRAMPAA FOR THAT GOLDEN LINE.

/and my laptop overheated and the comment saved PRAISE JEBUS

I actually love that she's writing to Tyler. No idea why. (Knowing you it'll probably turn into a lovey-dovey race-against-time-to-save-the-girl thing but whatever. I like it.)

Crap, they knew each other.
/news to me

How old is this sister?
/can't tell if she's going overboard with the bitching when it comes to Katie
/and awkward moment I just realised how many Katies I know

Wowzers, Alexa can feel things like guilt? I was under the impression that she really only felt hatred.
OH, so it's fleeting. Otay. That makes more sense.

And gurl pls, you ain't updating every two weeks. Let's be honest here.
/and pls don't I still need to read HtBH

Love the update! I can't get over how amazingly this is written! I look forward to the next chapter! :')

OH I FINALLY REALIZED THAT YOU CHANGED THIS STORY FROM A FANFIC TO AN ORIGINAL. DOES THAT MEAN YOU MIGHT PUBLISH IT? EEPP I CAN'T WAIT. I NEED TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS. (I JUST PICK TYLER AS BRIAN THOUGH) UPDATE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE XX

Beautiful banner and layout, I really like the way it looks.
You opened the story very nicely, gave a very detailed description of everything.
This seems like a fresh, creative idea. I'm glad that there are still new ideas pouring out from the MIbba community.
This is a very dark story, and so far you portray well. Hope to see an update soon.