Asleep or Dead - Comments

without my knowing it - this should either be "without me knowing it" or "without knowing it". I'm not all too sure but I do think it should be phrased "without me knowing it" due to your tense.

You did a great job entirely. I like that you include a flashback to the day they met and he way you characterized Jimmy. Right from the beginning I was cheering for things to go his way. I like the way he's a little sassy when he suggest to Zacky that he doesn't want a social life.

He could almost be sleeping, except for the tubes wrapped around his arms and torso, and he could almost be dead, except for the beeping coming from one of the machines, signaling the beating of his heart, and the gentle rising and falling of his chest. That has to be my favorite lines throughout the entire oneshot. It's so dramatic yet calm at the same time.

I like that Jimmy acknowledges he's always alone now. Right from that sentence I felt like he almost accepted the way Johnny's now existing. Also, you almost got a few very manly, of course tears out of me at the end.

I hate but love that Jimmy has accepted Johnny will never come back to him. I love it because I feel like Jimmy's an easily character to relate to, he understands that life must go on, you can't always dwell in past events. I hate it because he's so easy to relate to, he expresses his feeling so realistically that I wanted him to have it all.

Overall, I feel you really pulled me into the story. You gave just the right amount of background information + characterized Jimmy though out the different time periods well enough for me to feel that he'd changed, even before he went on to explain it.

This is so fantastic, even though I'm crying right now.

So... I hate you...yet I really love you! This was just beautiful!

omygod!! it just.. so perfect! you’re perfectly amazing :D I fucking love it!<3

u made me cry! I LOVED IT AND HATED IT!!! god i wish there was more!

As I said on DeviantART, I LOVE THIS.
It's so sad, but so beautifully written that it made me get all warm and tingly inside. Sort of.
You should so continue this, THAT WOULD BE SO AMAZING.

My heart. Just shattered.
This was so AMAZING okay? I loved it :) x