Eager to Sin - Comments

I found this one shot to be a bit boring, to be honest. I couldn't really relate to Brian (not that I've ever had sex, but you get what I mean). The sentences were kind of just said. (Meaning they were read like this: He did this. Then I did this. I did that. Then he did that. Kind of boring, right?) I didn't know how all the sexy times made him feel. I didn't know if Brian liked being thrown around and used. I mean, did he like it? Did he feel like a slut? Did he want to be topping instead of bottoming? Basically, I felt your one-shot needed a little more feel into it, so you can appeal to your readers.
Sorry if I'm coming off rude, I'm not really one to construct constructive criticism.
Besides those things, I always enjoy some smutty Bratt!

Yeah, the people above have done a pretty good job of summing it up.... It was sexy and written quite well. I liked the ending; it made me want more, to find out if Matt does anything about it, or if Brian does, or even if Jimmy intervenes.
I think the layout was easy to read, though the picture in the background got a smidgen distracting lol
The prompt you chose was obviously there, except for maybe at the end. I think that was possibly introducing a bit too much plot, but then again, I liked the ending a lot, so.....
I did spot a few things that could have been fixed, well, more like changed. For example, you said ... shooting down his/my throat. twice very close to each other, and it would have been better to have changed it up a bit so you're not repeating yourself.
Otherwise, great entry, and thanks for entering!! :)

holy mother of all that is awesome in this world!
this...was awesome!

This is an amazing one shot