So first thing I notice is the font. It's hard and annoying to try to read.... But moving on from that, again, you wrote a hot story and did it relatively well.
I liked how you used the prompt, and I really didn't expect what happened after that to happen, nor did I really expect that last line. So in terms of surprising me, extra points for doing it well. I also liked the picture in the background. It just seemed to suit the story well.... And definitely didn't lead on to the ending either. So yeah, thanks for entering and for doing so twice :) Good luck!
March 20th, 2012 at 07:12am
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But moving on from that, again, you wrote a hot story and did it relatively well.
I liked how you used the prompt, and I really didn't expect what happened after that to happen, nor did I really expect that last line. So in terms of surprising me, extra points for doing it well.
I also liked the picture in the background. It just seemed to suit the story well.... And definitely didn't lead on to the ending either.
So yeah, thanks for entering and for doing so twice :) Good luck!