August 15th, 2012 at 04:37am
Written in Blood - Comments
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I really like this! update soon please?July 11th, 2012 at 11:55pm
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Its really short...are all of your chapters ganna be this short?June 24th, 2012 at 08:48am
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love it! :)
can't wait for more, update soon please!June 21st, 2012 at 01:54pm -
I like the update!
Keep it going.June 20th, 2012 at 10:06am -
Hey! The first thing I noticed was that you used a dangling whatever it's called. Haha. What I mean is that, your first sentence makes it sound like the dress is holding his hand. You should've written "My mother, dressed in her black and white business dress, held my hand." Watch out for that because it throws the whole story off.
"Literally no one hanged out after school."
Another thing I noticed was that you wrote "hanged" instead of "hung". "Hanged" is only used when someone "hanged" themself. You should change that. (:
Alsoooo, you kind of switch tenses a couple times. The most noticeable one is " I turned a corner into an alleyway that led to the park. I don’t care if it takes an extra ten minutes. . ." It's not a big deal and you don't have to change it if you don't want, but I just noticed it. (I'm in a really critical mood).
But I like your plot. I haven't read anything like it on here. Of course I've read vampire/human pairings but I'm never read it where it's a punishment before. It's really unique. (:
You last chapter leaves me wanting more! I hope you update soon. Despite the errors, I'm going to subscribe because you're a good writer overall and I really like it.June 20th, 2012 at 08:21am -
I really like it so far :)
can't wait to see where you take it, please update soon!June 9th, 2012 at 04:55pm -
I like it so far.
More updates please.May 19th, 2012 at 06:13am -
Keep!!!! Update soon!!May 5th, 2012 at 03:29pm
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keep going this is awesomeApril 26th, 2012 at 01:37am
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I wanna know what happens next :) update soon?April 17th, 2012 at 07:03am
:)