Einkerkern - Comments

I liked this, normally I'm wary about stories about this kind of content, but it looks like it's being handled really well. There were one or two grammar mistakes, just commas where they shouldn't be and it broke up the flow a bit. Overall the content was really good and the tension was really well written, I like the sound of this and I think it'll be done really well so I'm subscribing :) the only thing I'd change is the amount of space around the actual story content in the layout, but toher than that it's good :)

The layout contrasts a bit against itself and the picture is off center, but yeah, it's a good layout all in all. The picture is eerie, but provides where the setting takes place.

I did like the content. I don't usually like stories about World War II, but I set that aside and paid attention to the raw emotion in this. The emotion was deep, and it really showed itself in a great way. The detail was just fine as it was. You provided enough to keep the story interesting and kept it far from boring the reader.

I think you should keep up with the story. I'd love to see where it goes and see where you take the plot. c: It has great potential to keep readers involved because there is an edge that will keep them coming back.

*Firstly the title is so suited.
Gosh darnnit! Wish we could edit comments xD

Firstly is so suited. German title, German subject. However, I think you should revamp the layout. The picture is amazing but the background takes away that raw effect, it clashes way too much. Also, I think you should include a summary instead of having a great big black gap.

I noticed some puctuation issues throughout the prolouge, uneeded commas etc,. A quick reread will sort that out. Otherwise this story could be amazing. You can take this in so many directions and I think you've written the proluge well, and should take your time with chapter one. You can make a great story from this.