I hate to start off with the negative, but I was really disappointed that this doesn't have a summary, especially because it's a chaptered fic, and as a reader, I feel like I do need something so that I can get a grasp on what exactly it is that I'm getting into.
I thought this was a neat story, and I feel like it has a ton of potential, but reading the first chapter, the flow is a bit monotonous and choppy, so I would suggest trying to vary your sentence structure a little more. I also have to admit that I was a little disappointed at the lack of characterization in the opening chapter, just because I feel like the only thing I know about these two female characters is that they’re both college roommates and they like The Maine, and as a reader, I feel like I need a little more in order to feel any sort of connection to the characters.
I thought this was a neat story, and I feel like it has a ton of potential, but reading the first chapter, the flow is a bit monotonous and choppy, so I would suggest trying to vary your sentence structure a little more. I also have to admit that I was a little disappointed at the lack of characterization in the opening chapter, just because I feel like the only thing I know about these two female characters is that they’re both college roommates and they like The Maine, and as a reader, I feel like I need a little more in order to feel any sort of connection to the characters.