Don't Cry - Comments

  • Smoothies

    Smoothies (100)

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    Awh, this was really cute. I love the way you incorporated the riddle. I like how she found the answer in the mirror and how she found the picture of him. I must say, Daniel has quite the timing.

    The only mistake I noticed was in the line “I told you I’d be back,”. The comma should be a period and I would suggest moving the dialogue down to the next line to make it flow better.

    Good job on this. :)
    June 12th, 2012 at 01:35am