This was very descriptive! Also very well written. I can tell that you put a lot of love into writing this and I appreciate that. I love what you did with the inspiration for this. As I was reading it, I could see the colors of the photo and near the end I could picture the entire thing in my mind. That was the purpose of me holding the contest and you did a wonderful job of being so imaginative as to do your own thing but still stay true to the inspiration. The first few paragraphs change point of view a lot, though, which was distracting at first but as I kept reading I noticed you stuck with third person. I definitely think this works better in the third person so that was a good decision on your part. I loved the inside look at an older James -- that's one of my favorite things to write (an older, more mature player in the future). Awesome job and thank you so much for joining my contest! xo
June 11th, 2012 at 02:54am
