One More Step. - Comments

I loved this! it was very well written. Like the others have said, it's a bit short, that's only because we'd like to see more. maybe write a short story leading up to the events?.. that would be absolutely amazing! anywhore..great writing ^-^

I work at Subway. I hate that job, and honestly feel like I'm being haunted by it so the first thought that came to mind was 'Oh not this again!' But once I read the story Subway was the farthest thing from my mind. It was very well written, but I wanted to know more. It kind of leaves you hanging. Very good and very well written though.

Agree with Miz Erie C: it was too short, seemed as if Frank didn't really want to die, but was just, idk, standing there aimlessly :/ the dialogue should look like that :
“Don’t come any closer Gerard, I can’t do it anymore, you need to go away.” I shook my head in mock disbelief.

“ Fat chance of that Bubba, I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” Frank started to say something but I cut him off. “So how do you think we should do this? I was thinking head first so that there is no chance I end up veggie soup.” He...

Okay C: anyway, it was good for a first thing C: just always remember to make it look as realistic as possible C:

V Yeah, I was kind of thinking the same thing. There's a lot more to this story than what was posted here. And, just as a voice of reason, Frank gave in awful fast for someone intent on jumping; jumpers normally take a while to talk down.

Not bad for a start.

I want the back story of why frank was gonna commit suicide.
e_e