The Dollhouse - Comments

Comment Swap!! I really love all the detail, and the chopped sentences at the end of the first paragraph are perfect. The detail of the mannequin is really vivid and gives me a great image of how it looks and how the aura is around it. And the more complex words are awesome too and makes the story that much better, pulsating, marmalade, intangible, they are all really awesome. Overall I really love this. it sounds like a really long poem to me. and it sounds really amazing. i love it! This was by far one of my favorite things I have read on this site, pure perfection!(:

Okay, so I promised you a review, and here it goes:

I like your layout, is simple and the colors aren't super bright, which is a wonderful thing. I've seen so many layouts in here that are so disgraceful I couldn't even read the story.

As for the summary, it is short but very intriguing, it makes us want to read the story to find out what it is about.

I absolutely love the way you write, all the detail and the words you use, just the way you're able to pull the reader into your story with these amazing descriptions that are detailed but not ever boring. The story itself is mysterious and it reminds me of a Joss Whedon kind of world, for some reason. Maybe you've heard of the TV show Dollhouse? That's what your story reminded me of.

The only thing I dislike about this is the fact that there's only one chapter, you should so write more, I'd love to see these amazing characters develop furhter more and see them involved in some sort of action. I see this story has immense potential to become something dark yet beautiful. You really should keep writing, even though this is a story it sounded like poetry, it's very very beautfiful and I have this feeling that you read a lot, am I right?

Kudos on the lovely work, I'm recommending and I hope you continue this story in the future!

I honestly have no words to describe how much I love this. This was gorgeous, pure art. This is beautifully written; your details and descriptions of this empty, sordid life in this dollhouse are marvelous. These girls (beings of sorts?), who are personified as empty and frail and fragile and wanting to feel something, are shining characters in themselves already, even though we don’t know each individual one; they shine, nonetheless, and I can imagine them almost floating along in the world. I can go on and on and on forever and ever as to how much I love this little drabble, this amazing work of art, but I doubt it would ever be enough. This is amazing and somehow, I can relate to these girls. I think we all can, to some degree, how we steel ourselves in this world and hide the pain, even though it’s often too great. (I mean, this is how I see and read it. If this story harbors a totally different meaning and I look like an idiot right now, please let me know, haha.) And I’m curious to know who this “he” is.

I really wish this was a full, chaptered story, as I’m left with so many unanswered questions about so many things. Who are these girls? Who is this “he”? What exactly is going on here? I think this has massive potential to be a wonderful chaptered story!

I’m glad that I got to read this, as it’s absolutely gorgeous. Great, great job. <3