Unknown Pleasures - Comments

Oh god, Ryan looks even more of a douche bag than he did the last time I clicked his picture. But he's sweet and is using his brain again, which I love. And, once again, you created a perfect bublegum pop complex for him with the cute overload.
I love how you included why exactly Carted hadn't made a move before, because I was beginning to thing he was just being a pussy and was acting like a scared little bitch who couldn't grow big enough balls to admit a crush. Then again, it was more than a crush, so I imagined it'd be harder. But still. Valid reason that I refuse to try to dispute with my nonsense.
Okay, now it's time for me to make you mad. Though I love how everything was tied up in a nice little blue bow(Like Korra!), I think there would still be a bit more to work out. Like there's some unresolved things there and this shouldn't be the end. For instance, getting their things from Ryan's father, or that fact that their father will undoubtedly be pissed out about the whole situation and some some sort of action. Or the fact that Teddy might not feel the same way towards his father as Ryan does, he might actually want to have something to do with him. Or maybe I just want another chapter, I don't know.
Oh, and your ending was sickening. It was too perfect, super cheesy, and overly lovey. I felt the need to throw up a rainbow of hearts after I read it.

aww yayy :)
it was so cute, i loved it!!

God I just mindlessly hate Ryan whenever I think of his picture. Just a mindless fucking rage. he looks like a douche and has that whole blond hair brown eyebrows thing going on. Fuck.
Anyway. Ryan seemed like this perfect kid that knew how t deal with everything, then he starts telling off his dad. Like, I get wanting to tell of your parents for something that they did, but come on. If his dad is always like that, then he's probably used to it. I think to want to tell off your parent or get a smart mouth like that you'd have to work up to it, and really all his dad did was spit out some drunken words. I think Ryan was kind of asking to be slapped with what he said, how he said it , and when he said it. He should have seen it coming, and I think with how he handles everything else he should have been smart enough in that one moment to handled it better so it wouldn't happen. And, for that, he deserved to be slapped.
But, in general, he doesn't deserve to have a hand laid on him (unless it's Carter's and it's being laid in/on certain places) and I kind of wanted him to fight back. Though it's a great thing he didn't because that would have ended horribly. Seems like that slap knocked his brains back into him.
Oh, and I love how you can make something all sad and depressing seem like something really cute and totally set it up for every romantic possibility your mother could think of. But I hate how you don't use any of those possibilities and instead have him bawl his eyes out! What, no kiss? No, 'I've liked you since_____'" No freaking kiss!? A little peck on the lips at lease, come on! You hate me, I swear.

i started reading this coincidentally, and then i was like, holy shit this is for my contest!! :D
it's so good so far, i love it!! can't wait for the second chapter. Carter is just so sweet.
also, i really like the layout :)

thank you for getting your entry in so soon!