‘Victoria Suarez has a hard trusting people’ is a mistake in your summary, which is a shame. ‘One night him and his friends’ would be changed to ‘he and his friends’ to improve it. This looks like it might be promising, though. You’ve got an excellent back story to your character and her interactions with her family. I’d change the layout or edit it a little to suit the story but other than that this is a really enjoyable piece of writing, well done!
June 22nd, 2012 at 02:26pm