Il Mondo Perduto - Comments

I've never read a story quite like this one, it completely blew me away. You described everything in perfect detail and allowed a movie to play in my head. It's just simply amazing, and I need more!

BTW. I recommended and subscribed :)

WOW. Just wow.

One of the most creative and inventive stories I have read on this site. I know everyone is telling you this, but the layout really was just absolutely perfect. It wasn't too confusing, interesting, it flowed perfectly. You have an amazing talent for writing. The only thing is I think that you should have made it a bit longer, but that's only because it was so amazing! Keep writing please.

OH NO. WHERE IS THIS B*STARD GOING?

Kidding. Great update, though! There wasn't a whole lot to go off of, but at least we got insight on his family and his adventure trying to get The Eye. I hope they all make it out and live happily ever after with beautiful little kiddies playing in a meadow under a shining sun.

Yup, I'm a sucker for those :) Aha, I can't wait until the action really starts happenin'!

Wow.

The layout is really great, it helps sets this eerie, unclear scenery. It helped me invision the world Josephina is in, especially with the picture.

You came up with a fabulous story idea and the way it's written, makes me want to read more. I need to read more, you're leaving us in suspense. You're not killing us with details but you're guiding us to help see in out mind The Lost World.

It's just. . . wow. . . amazing really.
Well done! <3

"You shouldn't be here. You don't know the things that women has done."

"Women" should be "woman".

I must say, I dislike you for giving us a cliffhanger! I want to know what this mysterious man means by what the woman has done. What woman? What has she done? Will Josephine ever see him again? And will she be accompanied on her journey to find The Eye? I hope so. I'd hate to go alone on an important journey.

I am definitely subbing and reccing. I hope you update soon :)

Only one error in the story:

Josephina's gift is what saved her from monotony and boring, but it could just be the thing that gets her in the end.

"Boring" should probably be "boredom" with the way it is used in this sentence:)

This was amazing. In all honesty, this was the first story I've read today that I've thoroughly read through--please don't tell! HAHA.

Your words are gripping and deep. The thoughts flowed and there wasn't too much detail to overwhelm me. This was just perfect.

I really am curious about this new world. I am assuming it looks like the picture you've shown, which still isn't much to go by. But I hope you describe it more in later chapters. It's difficult to picture whether it looks something like a kingdom form the medieval era, a modern day Chicago, or something other-worldly like Asgard from Thor.

This really is amazing so far and I am going to read the next chapter right now!

Comment swap. :)

I really liked the way your layout complimented your story.

I loved the story though, I liked the quote at the beginning.

Very powerful.

I'd like to read more of this.

It's a great story and very attention grabbing but I agree with the first comment. The summary is very long and almost too filled with detail. I would say make the summary you first chapter make the first chapter your second and write a new summary with an attention grabber. I love the imagery and the scenery. Good job!

wow this is great. the layout is literally gorgeous, and the photo fits so perfectly with what i've read so far!

the prologue is a lovely length. i've seen them a little too short sometimes, or a little long, but this is great. the writing is beautiful too. i really can't wait for the rest of this (assuming it's a chaptered, if not it's lovely as it is as well). i didn't notice any spelling errors, or grammatical errors. good luck with the contest. <3

First comment, awesome. I think that you should make the summary more of a hook, because you made it as long as the story. The story itself was actually pretty good. I thought that you used a great amount of detail. I wish you luck on the contest.