Victor - Comments

Comment swap sent me here!
This story is so amazing" it's interesting to get a glimpse of the hunger games from a different era, to meet and interact with tributes from long ago, before Haymitch and possibly even Mags I absolutely love this story and I'm so interested in reading more! You did a great job with the dialogue and writing. Five stars all the way! Keep up the good work!

Love love love this story! I love how real it all feels and how I feel as if I'm right there with her. I suggest you keep writing the way you are because the games are going to be good. I am a hunger games fanatic an have not been disappointed. This is the first fanfic I've read for the hunger games that did not feel like a carbon copy! Keep up the originality of your characters and I will be following this story!

*Comment Swap*
Having never read a hunger games story, so this surprised me. It was written very skilfully and I enjoyed reading it immensely!
I love that there is so much room for potential with this story, there are so may things that could happen and I really look forward to seeing what you come up with!
It was very easy to read also.
Praise on your theme as well! It's easy to read, many people make the mistake of making a theme that contrasts too much, so it was pleasing to see a nice theme like this.

**Coment Swap**
This is the first story I have read based off of the Hunger Games! I enjoyed the first chapter, and I don't think I saw any grammar errors, which is great!! I haven't watched the Hunger Games myself, but I have been wanting to! I'm hoping it isn't as bloody as you described it though! Watching a beheading doesn't seem so appealing haha! Anyways, good job!

*Comment Swap*
This is the first Hunger Games fanfic I've been given on comment swap. I think you did a splendid job on mimicking the tone from the Hunger Games. I love your transitional phrases they make for a smooth read! I recommended this story (: Please keep updating!

Comment Swap: This is interesting; i haven't seen a hunger games fanfiction yet and its a great concept, lots that can be explored. The writing is actually pretty good; you have a great vocabulary, some smooth similies and that characters actions really jump off the page. great work!

Comment Swap sent me here. I love reading about the Hunger Games! It's anything Hunger Games that's really good and sticks out to me. You have a really good plot line and you followed it really well. I love how you made it your own. Most usually try to follow the book too much. Keep up the work. :)

(comment swap) Well I am glad I got this story from the comment swap because your writing style is beyond brilliant. I for one loved the hunger games books and it's great how you are manageing to make your own creation from something so famous. Also your character description is really thought out and quite frankly believable. So good work, and I am going to keep up with this story!.

(Comment Swap) I read the first chapter of this and I absolutely loved it. I guess I'm behind on the times; I've neither read Hunger Games nor seen the movie, so I didn't want to go too far before I really understand everything that's going on. Spelling and grammar are excellent; something that's very refreshing to see. Technical aspects aside, even without reading the book or seeing the movie, you did a wonderful job of drawing me in to the story. I could definitely imagine what was going on with these characters and the connection between the family members was palpable. The only thing that I might have concern with is the sudden tense change in the last two sentences. I hope to come back to this story once I've read the book and read the rest of what you've written!

~Comment Swap.
Wow, you have a lovely start on this story, Your writing style is beautiful, flowing, very descriptive.
your characters are very believable.
as I read I didn't come across any spelling or grammatical errors. This is a very interesting fanfiction, wonderful.
This is a fantastic Hunger Games fanfiction
well done.
:)

I feel like I repeatedly keep commenting on your story, but I got sent here by comment swap again. So, I guess I'll just add onto my previous comment!

I've read a majority of your story and I think you did such an excellent job at describing the characters, especially Cali, and the each scene. I love when authors write in a way that paints an image the reader's mind to where they can picture exactly what's going on. You did just that and again, it was a job well done!

comment swap :)!

I, personally, have never read The Hunger Games, but you really don't need to read it for this story, and I'm glad you did that; it gives you more readers :). Cali seems very strange and out there, especially because she is imagining killing people , I feel like she'll be very good at this... Anyway, I like how you set this up, and I think this is a really good idea for a first chapter, and I feel really bad for her and Justen's family. Thanks for the good read!

The only thing I would suggest is maybe change the layout. I understand it's a bit of a dark story, but a background other than a color would really add to the story I think :)!

comment swap as well. i haven't seen or read the hunger games, so i can't compare, or see how much this is similar to or inspired by the original book/movie. i'll treat this like an original story. i've read three chapters and then bits of the other chapters, too.

i have to say i was very surprised by this story. at first, after the introduction, i wasn't very convinced was i would enjoy it, but your storytelling immediately drew me in. you make your sentences simple and straight to the point, but it narrates the story very, very well. i'm quite impressed. each chapter moves the story forward and adds new information, new actions and, which is important, hints new things that make people want to read more. the story is quite simple, plot-wise, but that works well. as someone who has no idea about the hunger games, i was a little confused by districts and how it all worked, but it didn't stop me from enjoying the story. and that's what counts. people down there mentioned descriptions but to be honest, i didn't find your style very descriptive. yes, you added how a descriptive sentence here and there, but that isn't a descriptive style, just the necessary information that separate boring from interesting. and i liked that you didn't add too many descriptions in here. it suited the plot which should be full of action. and it was. great job!

Like many others, I'm here from Comment Swap. I have never read the Hunger Games, but this was not an issue while reading Victor. You use a lot of description, and it doesn't often repeat itself which is nice to see. Your characters are very clear and defined, I like who you've made Cali be. All the interactions seem realistic, but not boring. Keep it up! =)

came here from comment saw and let me just I'm huge fan of the hunger games!! i have read the whole series in like a week! but anyways on to your story, it's very good and well descriptive and very spot on to the owl of the hunger games! thought your background made it hard to read a bit but thats ok! keep updating!!

Hi! Here because of the wonderful comment swap ...
Firstly, I have to admit that I haven't read past the first chapter of the real Hunger Games, but I love how well written this is!
I enjoyed it a lot and am now going to move onto the other chapters ...
JOB WELL DONE!

Sorry, Comment swap led me here twice!!

Comment Swap led me to your story! To be honest, I've never read the Hunger Games series nor watched the movie. Before I started reading, I had a feeling like I would be a little lost because of my lack of knowledge on the story itself, but that wasn't the case at all! It's very well-written and you're descriptions seem to be spot-on!

I noticed in the story summary on the main page that links are visible. You should probably use BBcode for the link! Also, the background is a bit dark and it made it a little difficult to read.

Hey I'm here because of Comment Swap I'm glad it sent me to your story! I think this is a really cool idea for a story, I really do hope you keep this up, I think it's fantasic! Well done!

Comment Swap! - I honestly have never read a Hunger Games fanfic, because I'm scared that they wont do any justice to the stories. Reading ones from pre Katniss are interesting though. I like your writing, and how descriptive you are with the actions, and scenery. Truthfully, I could picture District 12, with the sun shining over it. I feel like Dorothea is too similar to Effie, something that you should think about. Other than that, I enjoy this story a lot! (: