Eponey 3 - Comments

I really like your stories. I went and read Eponey 1 and Eponey 2 so I would understand this one. I find your stories creative and fun, and your characters are mature for such young children. I would recommend doing some editing, Google is a good resource, or even just plain, old, spellcheck. I like your characters, though they seem to be lacking a little depth. Try thrusting them into scenarios that make them struggle or be challenged in some way so that your readers can see how they handle it.
Keep writing, I believe you can be a great author someday!
Hello and goodbye from Comment Swap.

I liked your characters a lot, but I got really caught up on minor capitalization/spelling/punctuation errors. I like green though, so the layout is nice. I'd say work on your plot more than anything, as there didn't seem to be much point to where we were going or why. Don't be afraid to throw your character's a curve ball!

Mainly some editing will fix any glaring issues. Proofreading and editing saves lives.

Keep writing!

I can see you definitely have a lot of insight on these characters and have thought them out long and well and I'd definitely suggest you throw in a bit more description about not only the characters but their surroundings and feelings and such as well. The story can feel a bit monotonous at time without descriptive sentences as if you're reading a play by play scenario rather then really taking in a setting. Other then that, keep on writing!

i think the layout is nice, but if you spiced it up a little bit i feel like it'd definitely benefit the story, a good layout is more important than you'd think! and since i haven't read anything previously to this chapter i'm a little confused as to what's going on, so i agree with a previous commenter that a little more elaborate summary/or quick background would be helpful! other than that, i think the writing is nice, and you did a good job. a mistake i noticed is in the summary "A girl still do need some fun, and this certainly is is." 'a girl still do', and 'certainly is is' don't make sense, but a quick edit will fix that. good luck with your story.

The layout didn't really draw me in but I continued on with the idea that its the words that count. I would have liked more of a description about what the characters looked like or what the setting looked like, I guess I'm a big fan of small details like that plus it really helps to paint a picture.
Very clean cut and I didn't find anything wrong technically. Also, lovely natural writing style. Keep Improving and keep working at it. Sadie J. Blue xxx

As I haven't read the prequel or sequel, I'm a little confused as to what's going on in the story. However, the layout is nice and clean, as is the writing style. I'm usually not a stickler for asking for background details in stories, but I think you'd benefit a bit more by giving a bit of an insight for readers who haven't read the rest of the series.