Crawl. - Comments

Wow. Great description. Hope to see more

From the comment swap.
Even though this story was extremely upsetting due to what it was about, this was amazing. Your descriptions were wonderful and they really brought this piece together.
I doubt that you're going to continue this, but by itself, it is just amazing.
Great job.

Wow. This made me sad and it hurt a little to read because I imagined it as I read. But I liked it! The imagery you used was great. I do agree with the previous comments about the personalization of the characters. But you may have been meaning to keep it vague? Are you planning on continuing it? I would read it if you posted a second chapter.

good start:) im not sure I can bear to read it though, i does make me feel slightly sick, but i will subscribe and give it a go:)

update soon:)

Think it would make a good story. Honestly don't know if I'd read it though.. or if you should continue it. But if you want to, go for it Beautiful <3

Think it would make a good story. Honestly don't know if I'd read it though.. or if you should continue it. But if you want to, go for it Beautiful <3

I dont know what to comment.... but.. knowing what I know. this is... horrifyingly amazing. horrifyingly.

This story is beautifully written. I can easily visualize and conjure up the images of what is happening. Keep it up,

-Subscriber

I think the actual writing of this is very good- the word choice and syntax, and you certainly create a dismal mood, but there is no characterization in this piece. They're very flat ad could be dropped into any story about an abusive relationship, which is a shame, because with stronger characterization, this would be an excellent piece.

This is very interesting and unique. I cant wait to see story is laid out because I love it when I cant predict what could possibly happen next. Update soon!

Comment swap has left me breathless. This story is beautifully written. Your vocabulary is very developed, which I am in love with. The only thing I'm a little on the rocks about is the fact that so many people write stories like this. What makes this one stand out? What makes it unique? That's what readers want; to see the uniqueness in the story they're reading. Just a little advice. -A