September 26th, 2012 at 05:25pm
A Devil for Me - Comments
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GAAAAHHH OMG!!! What happened?!?! You have to update ASAP! PLEASE???September 26th, 2012 at 05:11pm
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Haha, I don't exactly know what to write because I have so many ideas but I think I'll just go with the one that causes the most drama ;DSeptember 22nd, 2012 at 09:11am
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please update :)September 22nd, 2012 at 07:17am
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Okay, so I FOUND ITTTTTT!!!!
& guess what else????
I LOVE ITTTTTT (:September 10th, 2012 at 05:23pm -
:) YAY UPDATE!! i like it :) i cant wait till they find out he's a boy :DDDDSeptember 4th, 2012 at 03:36am
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@ love me always
I'll try but don't expect too much, it's 3am and I'm pulling an all nighter xD My brain is pretty dead atm :DSeptember 4th, 2012 at 03:06am -
please please please please update ;-;September 4th, 2012 at 03:02am
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Very impressive thus far.
I shall be awaiting an update.August 19th, 2012 at 06:03am -
I love ur story. Cant wait till Andy finds out ashlely a boy. Please upload soonAugust 13th, 2012 at 10:19pm
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holy cap you should make ashley go to the beach that would be hilariousAugust 11th, 2012 at 02:49am
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oh my god *on one knee* please update its so good :33August 7th, 2012 at 09:01pm
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daawwwww cute!!July 22nd, 2012 at 09:07pm
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aww cute ;)July 22nd, 2012 at 08:36pm
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I really like this story update soonJuly 22nd, 2012 at 07:53pm
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I know you have 5 other stories but plz update this one soon. I'm addicted already. I love that there gonna screw with Andy's head, I can't wait for the next chapter :)July 22nd, 2012 at 06:01pm
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DAMN I wish I'd got that idea. it all just sounds like something taken out of my mind.
there is only one bad thing about the story. I wants more right now! and it isn't there... can't fucking wait for moreJuly 20th, 2012 at 07:08pm -
ok i just started reading this and finished the updated chapters but now in my mind i will have a cross dressing ashley in there and i really like the story no. more like love please update soon :)July 16th, 2012 at 09:41pm
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Haha :)
I can't wait til Andy realises Ash is a guy xDJuly 16th, 2012 at 07:12pm -
SHOW
DON'T
TELL
Stop saying who they are and what people think of them. Stop. SHOW me.
Also. Your layout is really, really, really amateurish. I'm sorry. I don't mean for that to sound insulting, but the text on top of that background just comes off as...well...amateurish, as I said. I'd highly suggest making it blend better, perhaps darken it to a grayer color and shrink it down.
You need better description. Where you ought to have description, you lack it. Where you ought to lack it, you say things that are totally irrelevant to the story.
Also, you seem to be using the first chapter to show off that you know all the band members names.
You have four paragraphs (One that's two paragraphs that aren't spaced properly. You should fix that.) Most of what makes them up is a list of all the names. A ton of times. Pronouns are really good for you, make better use of them. Pronouns will treat you well.
On a more positive note, I'm so happy you've made good use of commas. I've read a lot of 'really well written stories' on here, so far, that haven't had a single comma in sight.
Great job with punctuation! It's very refreshing!July 12th, 2012 at 12:03am
Mwahahah Cliffhanger happened >:D