The Mate for him - Comments

I love it! Update soon <3

I love it!!!! That scene was soooooo hot!!!!!! Update soon!

Update soon!

Loving it so far.

i really like this story. update soon! (:

Oh, and plot thickens! Great job. I can't wait for more.

Huh, I didn't see that many errors. Just a few here and there. Maybe I just read over them?

Either way, I love the concept of your story! Please continue (:

First, you should correct you grammar. Capitalization and punctuation is definitely a big deal. The diction could be cleaner in order to prevent awkward sentences like ",Her body was extra curvy like a coke bottle but better." I wouldn't mind helping you edit in my spare time. Here to help. You have a good concept going, just clean it up a bit.

Like what you have so far, just work on editing.

I'm curious to what kind of hold Yuri has over Kari.

good story so far! keep on writing

Thanks i will do that now :)

Great story.
I would recommend more organization in the paragraphs though.Organizational writing makes it easier to read which could possibly get more readers.

I HAVE TAKEN YOUR COMMENT VIRGINITY!! MUHAHAHAHAHA!!! ;) anywayyyyy, good story keep writing please!!!!!!