Shades of Moons - Comments

I really enjoyed this! You have a very interesting set of characters! At this point I love them all, since they are all unique and have their own quirks. I give you props for that, some people find it difficult to come up with several different characters and make sure that they are all dimensional and what not.
You did have a few punctuation and grammar mistakes. But they can easily be fixed if you edit a little! So they are really nothing major.
Other than that I don't really know what to say. You definitely caught my attention after the first chapter, that's for sure! You had just the right amount description within your writing too.
Keep up the good work!

I had no intention of reading all five chapters, but given how nicely sized they were, and just how well you write it was impossible to stop.

You paint such a vivid, interesting picture of each of the siblings, with their own issues, and separate distinctive personalities. It makes it so you remember each of them on their own, not as a jumbled compilation of siblings. This just works, it works so very well for you and your story. I'm partial to Io and Europa thus far, just because they seem to share the best relationship and it really lends to their characters.

Also, your layout is just phenomenal. Best of luck with this!

That was absolutely amazing. :) The first time I commented on this story, I cheked it with my mobile phone and I couldn't see the layout. I have to say your layout is as amazing as your story is. *high five*

From Comment Swap--

Oh, my goodness gracious, great balls of fire, just judging by the layout and tiny summary, I can already tell you that I’ve fallen in love with this beautiful story. What a lovely layout this is; the purple and grey color scheme works so well together. And the summary. Wow. Though short, I adore the message it sends. I love that you named these four siblings after moons; Jupiter’s moons, I think. I’m excited to read the rest and find out what happens to these four awesome characters (:

Truthfully, I was surprised that Io is represented as male in this story, lol. I’m so used to seeing Io as a girl, but this was definitely refreshing! I like that he’s a fighter, who just wants to be recognized and not be outshined by his siblings. And I happen to loooove his relationship with Europa; it’s so sweet, how he cares for her and says the right things when she needs it the most. I’m curious to find out what’s going on Ganymede’s pregnancy (at least, I think it’s pregnancy) and if her siblings know about it. I’m also sensing that something is up with their parents – I think they’re astronauts or something, from what Io said in the third chapter – and it adds to the stress that the siblings go through. I like the element of mystery behind the sibling’s individual names and stories as well; I hope we’ll find out more about them later in the story!

I’m really, really interested and excited to find out more about these people and what’s going to happen next. I’m totally going to recc and sub to this, because it’s absolutely wonderful! Amazing job so far! <3

This is really interesting so far! :D I'm totally gonna subscribe! :D You really should update. I love their names and I like how you don't just introduce their back story from the start. It's always more interesting to figure things out slowly and piece them together. The same goes for their personalities. At the moment we only have bits and pieces and I like that. This story is totally awesome! I'm gonna recommend it, too. :3

I've only read the first chapter so far, and I really enjoy this. I your style of writing is interesting, I'm not sure if it's because it's unique or because it's refreshing to read something I like on this site again.

I was brought here by comment swap, and I'm very glad it did, because I really enjoyed reading this. I love the idea of the siblings all being named after moons.
One thing that sort of bugs me, is that I lack so much information. It's a bit like you're telling me a story, without giving me the important backstory. Or is it meant to be like this? Because if that's the case, then it's working.
I don't really have anything more specific to asy, I have little to complain about, and I genuinly enjoyed reading it. The only thing that really bugs me, is shortening names to just the first letter, and that's just my personal preference.
I'll be looking forward to reading the rest!

Hiya:) from what I have so far I really liked it:) I like how use a lot of description and how the words flow very easily. The way you have the characters described in the summary and how you written (so far) about them goes into depth of what the want or crave or wish. I know you already have characters listed from oldest to youngest, but I think you should add their age (or I might have missed it :/ ). Overall, I think this is going to turn into a great story :)

(Comment Swap) Not sure what to mnake out of it, but you could make the summary sharper, as to actually summon the readers?
(Chapter 1)
Boxing? in a 'Rink', made for Hockey?
The vocabulary works well within the confines of this story.
Thus pulling the words into an easy flow.
What I lack is detail. The story seems to lean back on a past I have no knowledge on.
Whom was he fighting, and why?
Short of the mention4ed promis of the money?
I'd like to see more of the people you mention.
Where are we, who are here?
Details, details, but these are what makes the story.

[comment swap]

The layout is gorgeous! I like how it adds to the feel of your writing (:

And that summary is to die for! I absolutely love summaries that are short and to the point. The reader is definitely getting an idea of what this story is about, and yet still keeping them in the dark enough to really want to find out more.

And your first chapter (:
There were a couple of grammatical errors, and a few punctuational errors, but other than that it was really quite good!

"The collective groan erupted throughout the makeshift rink..." - I'd suggest changing the "the" to an "a" as it's just awkward wording.

"He threw his watch into his backpack. Heading into the locker room, he pulled the bottoms of his sweats up to his knees." - this could easily be one sentence as the first sentence is a little awkward on it's own. Maybe change it to, "Throwing the watch into his backpack, he headed into the locker room pulling up the bottoms of his sweats to his knees." You don't have to but it's sounds much nicer and flows a little better.

"he prayed that he wasn't hurt enough for his siblings to observe." - maybe change "observe" to notice as observe doesn't really fit quite into the context of the situation.

Overall, it was an excellent chapter. I quite liked how you kept this short and yet the reader really knows what's going on and it's a great introduction to the character and his feelings and thoughts (:

Hello there. :) Well that was really different from what I'm used to reading but I love it so you better keep on writing this. Don't you dare give up. -.- The dialogue flows really well and I'm wondering how the characters will develop. The chapters were really interesting and pulled me in from the start. XD Keep up the great work and share your imagination with me and your fans. :DDDD