Never Told You - Comments

It might take two to cheat but someone who knowingly helps someone cheat on their bf or gf is scum. You knew he had a girlfriend and still went after him on multiple occasions. While he may be a whore who doesn't deserve his girlfriend. You my friend have no morals, code of ethic or anything.

Greetings from a mystical knight of the round comment swap table,
I've read through your first chapter so far, and so I shall give this a go. Your character dynamics are fantastically done, the way different characters' speech bounces off one another is really good and it both keeps you reading whilst getting you attached to characters, which helps since this has a fairly basic plot so far.
Constructive criticism wise, whilst I like how this story flows really well and doesn't get too bogged down in heavy description since it's quite light-hearted that works, but sometimes I think you also go a bit under, especially when you introduce new characters, you don't give them much description, nor of your main characters either- I'm not saying go overboard since I don't think that'd suit your style, but a little more here and there would really help with the imagery.
Grammar and punctuation wise, when you have speech such as: “It’s okay. I’m still alive.” I joked - You would end your dialogue with a comma, as following it you have a speech tag (I joked), unless it is a question or you are using an exclamation mark, then you leave it with those, but you never end a tagged piece of dialogue with a period. Furthermore, if you have a piece of dialogue which isn't continued later, without a speech tag following it, you would end it with a period instead of a comma, such as: “I’m Milan,” he put out his hand.
More fun things with commas, if you have description or basic text before a piece of dialogue which is not following on from a previous clause of dialogue, you would not put a comma after the text before you began the speech, such as: “What?!” I stopped dead in my tracks, “Why did you never tell me you had a brother?!” there would be no comma after "My tracks" but instead a period.
These are just really minor things and you don't do them often, but I'm trying to make this useful in some way so...
But overall the light-hearted tone works fantastically with this and it reads really nicely, with only a few slightly clunky bits where it either gets a bit cheesy (but I know that's easy to do in a romance story) or some sentences could use with being connected such as: I put my arms through and zipped it up. I was immediately warmed up. <these would flow much better joined by an and or such, simply to vary sentence length a little bit more which makes the read more interesting and can create some useful effects on the short sentences, since it emphasises.
Well, I gave it my best shot at doing one of these... hope it was helpful in some way or another!

update soon! this just keeps getting better and better

That awkward moment when I had just thought today, 'I really hope Never Told You geta updated!'

That awkward moment when I had just thought today, 'I really hope Never Told You gets updated!'

Ah yay! Their back together!!

great update! poor marshy getting beat up...and i legit thought her engagement to jude was real no joke...update soon!

great chapter! update soon!

love this! please read "my heart will go on" i need feedback from a fantastic writer. it shouldnt take long because i havent written very much

Love it! I hate Brittany..

great update! wonder what looch's reaction will be

Love it!

update soon!

Saad!

NOO MARSHY! DONT GO

update soon!

Aww. :( Mar was mean! I can't believe she said that to Rylan!

mar said some pretty nasty things...i feel so bad for rylan...update soon!

This is my favorite Bruins story.(:

awesome chapter! update soon!