No Emotions Required - Comments

  • One main rule of Mibba; spaces between the paragraphs of your story. Not only could you get reported for it but it also makes your story look a lot cleaner!

    Some lines are a bit redundant, like you talk about their being space for one more person to sit and the next sentence says there's room for a boy to sit. It's basically the same thing, and unnessicary added words.

    *Realized not realised.

    It's a good intro to your MC. It just needs a bit of polishing here or there and it could really shine. It wasn't super long so I really don't have a ton to go off of. Best of luck with this!
    August 8th, 2012 at 09:31pm