Sometimes I Wish You Did. - Comments

did you know this story made me fall in love with you because it's true

This is perf. I miss that feeling of seeing the guy I like in school and getting excited. You reminded me of that. This was well-written, good job!

This was pretty sad, like extremely sad. I wasn't sure what I was really getting myself into because I had seen this story recommended but it was a good story.

I'll have to say that I felt a lot of the emotions you portrayed, and you wrote them very well. I love the depth you went into while writing this. You didn't simply touch on, "I feel this way when I see her with you." You made it more like, "I feel this way when I see her with you and my heart aches" or "my pulse races" it was just that that made this seem so much better. I know these are true feelings too, not because of what the story is labeled, but because it is so relatable. I know other people could feel how you do, because i've felt it, and others have felt it and that's why I believe that this story could be one shared among so many different people.

Some of this didn't seem to flow as well as the beginning, I think that from paragraph three to four, there should have been some sort of transition, it just would have made the story read better but that's about all I saw. I did enjoy this.

Oh God, when I saw that this was a true story I was like 'oh crap am I going to get emotional here please god don't let me do this', but I did and my heart just sank when I read this but it was so beautiful. So, so beautiful. I loved how relatable it was and how much I kind of went 'omg, so me, so so me' in like, most parts of the story. Especially about the reading and writing bit and the humour. What I loved most though was that you repeated 'you don't know what you do to me, sometimes I wish you did'. That just got me and stabbed me over and over again.

It's like, just when I think oh alex can't be any more awesome at writing, you write this and I'm like 'ok I was wrong'. Ugh. You're just a fantastic writer and I'm seriously in awe of you right now.

This was a lovely short story. Your described the narrator's crush on him wonderfully and I think it's all very relatable. I like the contrast of the high that comes along with seeing him and being around with the crushing feeling of seeing him with someone else. The way you described the reactions were just brilliantly done and I like that it's repeated it's only been two weeks but she's so infatuated with him already.

I don't think the part about hockey and French works well. There's no transition, just out of the blue it goes from talking about how the narrator doesn't stack up to the guy's girlfriend to being at all his hockey games. The first four paragraphs were all about how he makes the narrator feel and suddenly it changes to what she'll do for him. It's just a bit of a jump. If it was set up earlier, like if she saw him in the hall outside of French class, or he's wearing his hockey jersey when she sees him, that would provide a connection so it doesn't feel so random at the end. That said, I know this is labelled as autobiography so I understand you were getting your feelings out.

I think this is a beautiful depiction of what it's like to have a crush on someone and not have those feelings returned. You captured all the conflicting emotions very well. I especially like the comparison to the other girl. All the elated feelings, the sadness, the insecurities, and desperate need for him to notice her is all just wonderfully written.

Omg. This is perfect. I can't even, ugh.
This is my all time favorite, just eeep.
I love this. Omg. I adore this.

So perfect, Ahhh.
I'll go now...

OH MY FUCKING GOODNESS
ALEX
WHAT
WHAT EVEN
OMG THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
YOU BASICALLY JUST WROTE OUT MY JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL
omfg this was so cute, yet sad and i think we should jump whoever stole your man
and then jump the girl that stole my man
then jump girls who steal guys in general
u feel me????
but seriously, you're freakin' amazing.
I LOVE YOU

holy fuck. holy. fuck. QRL.
i love it. i love this. i love you.
IT WAS SO CUTE.

sooo this is great and i loved it and it made me so sad... but did i mention that i loved it? because you wrote it. and you write daa best shit. just sayin'.

ARIE
IT'S OK BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT
THERE ARE LIKE BILLIONS OF BOYS OUT THERE
LITERALLY THAT'LL TOTALLY GET YOUR ODD SENSE OF HUMOR AND IT'S OK BECAUSE I'M TALL AND I HAVE NO BUTT EITHER SO IT'S COOL OH MY GOD
TEARS
TEARS EVERYWHERE FOR MY BBY
but in all seriousness
~hrmph!
This was lovely and relatable and I WANT TO JUST HUG YOU BECAUSE IT WAS BEAUTIFUL
beautiful~
SOMETIMES I WISH
THAT YOU WOULD UPDATE LIKE FASTER
but your wish for this guy is way more legit and ughaodfhjsldafslfh
ARIE TEARS TEARS TEARS FOR YOUR HORRIBLE FRENCH SPEAKING HOCKEY PLAYING BOY AND YOU
forget roman and isadora
THIS SHIP
THIS IS THE SHIP
Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to try to stop crying now okay bye~

This is beautiful, Alex. Simply exquisite.
I love how you describe the relationship that the girl has with the boy and how he doesn't even notice it because I feel like that's how it is a lot of the time.
One person notices all these things about someone else and they fall in love with the little things because it's all they have. But they cherish it. And the other person never knows.
Also, I love the whole French thing because I'm in French and I crushed hard on the guy I sat next to.
sklfkslf
this was perfect
and it's sad
and it's wonderful
and i love it.
<3

ALEX BB
THIS IS PERF
and so sad. I'm sad. Dumb bitch (not you, the bitch who stole your man in the story)
I like the semi-motif of "sometimes I wish you did" (THIS IS ME BEING ANALYTICAL AND SHIT. fuck english lol).
BUT YEAH. THIS IS SO CUTE. YOU DO THIS PLZ. PLZ PLZ PLZ.

This was absolutely beautiful, and I loved it all the way. Your descriptions are amazing, and I loved how you described everything to the fullest extent and perfectly. I found no grammar and spelling mistakes, which is a plus since it didn't distract me from the actual story.

I found the layout beautiful, but the only thing I would prefer is that the words were a bit more darker and more readable, but that may just be me. Everything was amazing! Thank you for joining!!