I love how real this is. You basically just went inside of someone's head, took out their thoughts, and spread them all over the page. Your characters were very real and really relateable and you wrote them incredibly well.
I liked how it was almost like the narrator was talking to someone else, but he was really talking to himself. You wrote it in such a cool way, and it was very stream of consciousness-esque, which was really cool to read. You caught the exact feel of someone's thoughts at 2am, and it was great.
Oh my god. This actually made me sad to read cause like ... I can sort of relate, you know? So I'm excited and yet a little scared to see where this goes. I don't normally approve of the rhymes-with-maggot word but I can look past that because you're an amazing writer and I love you and I know that's creepy but eh. Can't wait to see if there's more of this!
I liked how it was almost like the narrator was talking to someone else, but he was really talking to himself. You wrote it in such a cool way, and it was very stream of consciousness-esque, which was really cool to read. You caught the exact feel of someone's thoughts at 2am, and it was great.
But yes, really good job, I enjoyed this.