Embrace - Comments

Hi! I'm here from last night's comment swap! (I was really tired and just got the chance to do it now, so I'm sorry it's a little late but here we go!)

I'm a really big sci-fi fan so the fact that it's all dorky kind of already wins you major bonus points. AND THE FACT THAT IT HAS MY BABY KAYA THOUGH??!?!?!! (I'm a huge Kaya Scodelario fan so YOU JUST LIKE COMPLETELY WON ME OVER UGH COME HEREEE~)
That flashback gave me serious chills. SERIOUS.

I find the fact that she can't feel anything emotionally (except she kind of did) kind of interesting because most sci-fi fics here are pretty dry-ish as far as plot development goes so you've so far done a pretty brilliant job.

I do enjoy, like the person below me already stated, the fact that the descriptions are brief and pretty vague and leave the reader wondering how she got herself into that situation in the first place. This story sort of reminds me of Brave New World, which I read over the summer, except that it's kind of the opposite in that they drug themselves to feel happy all the time and don't really see anything wrong with that. So it's nice to see two different points of view in that respect.

The only thing I didn't really like was the layout itself. I don't know, I think I'm just the kind of person who is really nitpicky so maybe it's you and not me, haha. Maybe you could make the actual content area a tiny bit smaller or something? But besides that I think you've honestly done quite a stellar job. There were a couple of places near the end where some of your quotations were a little awkwardly placed, but that really wasn't a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

And of course, before I forget, welcome back to Mibba!

Okay, the fact that it's about science made me insta-excited to read it, since I'm the biggest science geek you'll ever meet. Then the part where you mention that emotion is illegal, just, omg.

I like the vagueness of it, and the brief descriptions.

The layout's also lovely. I hate the default font, though, so that was a bit off for me. lol.

Keep updating & welcome back to Mibba! :)

I came here because of your blog comment swap, and the first thing I thought was...
WOW!
Seriously, that was sensational! I know it's only the first chapter and not a lot has been explained yet, but if anything that makes it better. I'm really curious about the whole story now, and I want to read on. It's very well written, with excellent description of feelings and memories.

The layout is simple yet eye catching, and I like it a lot.

If this was a published book, I'd buy and read it for sure! Well done! :D

Dear author,
first of all I came here via your blog entry on comment swapping stories.

The layout isn't to my liking but as long as it's readable, it works.

The short summary was nice and makes a great impact on the reader, well done.

On to the first chapter.

This is a really nice chapter for being the first one. Though I have to say I was a little puzzled but I'm sure everything will clear up as the story unfolds. You know how to capture the readers attention and that workds to your advantage. I can't wait to see what was this project about and why General Orran was afraid of her.

Good job.

~Marian.

I love the way you write, your descriptions are extremely vivid and it's extremely engaging. The concept is extremely interesting, I can't wait to read more!!! Your technique worked!!! Recycled and subscribed, please update soon!!! Xxx :-)

I love the layout!
And as far as I can tell, this is going to be a very interesting story. It's got me thinking about what kind of project she had been put through.
Best of luck in writing the future chapters!