Woebegone - Comments

i'm completly captivated! love love love this

Fantastic. I'm curious to know if he's in trouble and that's why they're leaving.
Wonderful update!

I just think this is so fabulous.

This is seriously amazing... I've just read it all and I'm speechless. Utter perfection.

I really want to write a story like this but nothing can compare to this story. It's so powerful, I love it :)

Great read, thanks :D

I read through all of this in one sitting, and I must say that it's quite lovely. It isn't pretentious. It's a testament that succinctness can hold equal impact to verbosity. I personally adore the descriptions. They are very tangible, which increases their effect.

This is beautiful. I love how short and simple the chapters are but you pack so much into them. It's an easy to digest read but it's so powerful all the same. I'm definitely looking forward to reading more!!

this is so beautiful i cant cope
the layout is so fucking beautiful and simple and i can feel so many things reading these chapters

Oh my gosh, I can't believe it. This is astounding. Like..it's so very simple and short, but you can almost taste her emptiness, I can feel the ghosts she speaks of just by the tone of the whole writing. At points, my heart even aches along with her and it's amazing. You've done something that takes so much talent; embodying something so powerful in short, simple ways.

Thanks all below for commenting and anyone that does in the future!

Okay, I'm caught up and definitely sad. You can tell that you've written something great when it makes a reader feel something and that's what you've done. I feel sad for them, mainly for her, and it's just a consuming feeling.

I have chosen to review this story for Mibba Magazine, and once the article is written and submitted and edited, etc, it should appear some time in April. :D Thanks for writing a terrific story.

Chapter One: An interesting start to say the least. I can easily confirm that this relationship is unstable and built on a dependence of getting high and held together by sexual circumstances. It's not a tale that is told often but it happens more than portrayed. I'm intrigued and am eager to keep reading.

Chapter Two: Another example of this disfunction but a beautiful written chapter. I especially like the lines, 'the bed creaks like an old man standing up,' and 'I smell girl on his clothes, hands on his skins.' It's simple and elegant and all the more wonderful. You've painted an amazing scenario and I'm eager to learn more.

Chapter Three: Sad chapter. Not much to say, really, but I do like it.

Chapter Four: Wow, powerful chapter. Just when they're having a good day, he comes back in a whirlwind of anger and disfunction. I'm in love with this story, I am.

Chapter Five: You're seriously pulling at my heart-strings at this point. I just feel grief for this poor young girl and the life she's living. She should leave him. They're not good for each other.

Chapter Six: I don't know what to say that I already haven't, but I really do love this. I may stop commenting on every chapter and just read straight through, but know that I love it!

I really, really love this. The way you write is so beautiful.

This story is so damn beautiful that it actually hurts my heart a little.

I get chills and feel like CRYing but every sentence is pretty and smooth like syrup and I never want this to end

Every chapter leaves me heartbroken but I am in love

Someone knew they fucked up ha. God, I eat this story up, I just love it so much.

This is so amazing like I can't even. Just please, don't stop writing this. Write this forever <3

this is so sad yet so beautiful :O

For such a simple kind of story, this is brilliant. I can't believe how intoxicating this is, I want to read more and more (:

love love love this!