Bride to Be - Comments

thats a man

@ aaron hotchner
Well good! I'm glad! :)

I love this story!

Well there's nothing wrong with adding depth in the beginning. Anyways that sounds good.

She loves her store and her customers, she's just tired with her life. As the story progresses, it'll explain how she's feeling more.

I wanted everyone to know what the story was about. It doesn't necessarily give it away but, I wanted to catch people's eyes.

Don't worry. I will! :)

@ discoveringclouds

Interesting story. Although the emotion is unclear.. Of weather she loves her store and customers. You know? She should be more clear because she's a sole proprietor and worked really hard.

The summary gives a lot of your story away haha but I guess it's why I pressed it.

You should definetly add more setting as she sees it so it adds to the atmosphere.