A Beautiful Life - Comments

Hi, I'm from comment swap also. I loved the story, it was nice and simple, but still sweet. I was getting a little teary while reading it. I liked the way it was written as a flashback, and then you got to see the life the narrator was living now as the flashback ended. The vagueness was a little confusing, but it did give the reader room to come up with their own idea of what had happened. Over all, very nice!

Hi, I'm from comment swap also. I loved the story, it was nice and simple, but still sweet. I was getting a little teary while reading it. I liked the way it was written as a flashback, and then you got to see the life the narrator was living now as the flashback ended. The vagueness was a little confusing, but it did give the reader room to come up with their own idea of what had happened. Over all, very nice!

Hi, I'm from comment swap also. I loved the story, it was nice and simple, but still sweet. I was getting a little teary while reading it. I liked the way it was written as a flashback, and then you got to see the life the narrator was living now as the flashback ended. The vagueness was a little confusing, but it did give the reader room to come up with their own idea of what had happened. Over all, very nice!

[Comment Swap.]

I'm guessing throughout the chapter it's in past tense. Therefore the lay in the first sentence should be laid.

"He held you in his arms tenderly," She started the she should be lowercased.

Also the part where the character's mother is telling her about the day she was born should be spaced out. c: It looks very block text, which is highly unflattering and hard to read.

" Happy birthday ma petite ." He wished comma after petite and he should be lowercased.

Other than that it's very simple and nice. c: I like it.