@ mae721 I think that would help, or at least a quick overview of how they'd gotten closer over the months, or things they started doing together. The way it is is good, but the sense of time kind of gets lost and you kinda have to infer or even just guess how long they've known each other.
Would it make more sense if I included more of a date timeline? I have it in my mind that they met in January/February and didn't start sleeping together until July. I don't want to write Lilly's everyday for months because her everyday is probably just working, running and maybe talking to him on the phone while he's working. I'm trying to hit highlights. Let me know! I am more than happy to include more detail to show time passing.
I love the setup and the characters for this story, but it seems as if while you're trying to have it move along really naturally and not give obsessive amounts of detail, you're losing a lot of the storyline detail. Lilly just seemed to jump from "having relationship issues/being on the rebound' to "sleeping with Ben" without much detail into their daily relationship. I love it, it just seems to move at warp speed.