One Last Breath - Comments

I'm here as a judge for the First A7X Contest.

So, after reading the whole story, I'm still not entirely sure why it ended up being a vampire story, but here we are. It was interesting that you chose to write about an abusive relationship and instead of having save her and move her into a better life, you took it the supernatural route. I'm a bit sad that we didn't get to see her move on and into something happier, but what you chose to do definitely surprised me, if nothing else.

I wasn't completely sold on the way you wrote the abusive relationship. It was very graphic but it felt really shallow other than the graphic bits. Because of the short chapters, I felt like we just got tiny glimpses of what was happening and then things moved so fast that I was mostly just left confused and like I only got bits of all of the information. You don't have to go into huge amounts of detail, because obviously this is quite a sensitive topic, but having more emotion behind the dialogue would have helped add more depth to the story.

Thanks for entering!

Why this didn't continue bewilders me, but this was interesting. Especially the end, that cliffhanger. I'd like a sequel, I'd read it in a heartbeat.

I really like this. Abusive relationships are very intense. I can't imagine. I cant wait to see more of this

I really liked this too. Abusive relationships are intense dude. I just can't even imagine. Poor Ornelia but Alexander got what he deserved. He deserved to die for being such an asshole, I know that's cruel but it's true. Abusing people is not cool. Yay! Zacky to the rescue and a vampire, I love it! I think Zacky turned her and you should totally do a sequel. Very nice work on this. Love the banner and layout as well

I think I'll demand a sequel like the rest. c:

I want a sequel!!! That was fantastic and I can't even imagine how crazy it would have been if it was a full-fledged long chapter, story. Hope you write a sequel!!

I want a sequel! I loved reading this story! Mean old Alexander got what he deserved lol. I love the banner photo and it's nice to read a Zacky vampire fic! You must continue this.

Whoops *sequel my bad lol

Whoops *sequel my bad lol

So unexpected yet so gooooood! I usually hate open enders but this one is nice as an open end, but I would totally want a sequal!

I really want a sequel! Update soon!

awww he killed him so fast :( I wanted him to suffer what she did >=( I want a sequel!!!!!!!!!

no no no no, there is no way you are going to leave us here... I want a sequel! :)

When are you going to update? I must know!