Money Whore - Comments

Well done! :)

I believe this is by far one of the best three chapter/six word story I've ever read. I don't know if it was the poem you wrote in the summary which made the story get on track but I really like this. The feelings behind this were strong and she must have really been in love with him. Such a good story.

Thank you for entering my contest! :)

I really, really enjoyed how you integrated the word into the story. You used it in the title, and in the banner, and then used it well in the actual story. I also enjoyed that you used words like "fucked," "whore," and "cheap." The reason I liked that was because you managed to really create something powerful, and evoked some emotion out of me as a reader.

I wish that your choice of diction was a little stronger, because I felt that some of the words you used were just ordinary, and that kind of too away from the overall greatness of the story. I also wish that I felt more of the theme. I didn't get pride so much as I got, a cheap whore, who was upset. I got more of the love she had for him, and the sadness he made her feel, rather than pride.

Overall, I think you did a really nice job.

Thank you for entering my contest! :)

I really, really enjoyed how you integrated the word into the story. You used it in the title, and in the banner, and then used it well in the actual story. I also enjoyed that you used words like "fucked," "whore," and "cheap." The reason I liked that was because you managed to really create something powerful, and evoked some emotion out of me as a reader.

I wish that your choice of diction was a little stronger, because I felt that some of the words you used were just ordinary, and that kind of too away from the overall greatness of the story. I also wish that I felt more of the theme. I didn't get pride so much as I got, a cheap whore, who was upset. I got more of the love she had for him, and the sadness he made her feel, rather than pride.

Overall, I think you did a really nice job.