Mistletoe - Comments

This. Was. So. Cute.
It was simple, told a story, and was just all around generally lovely. I know it's the middle of the summer (where I am) and all, but there's always room for a little Christmas merriment and it definitely lifted my spirits. I also liked the understatement of them being a gay couple. I feel by steering clear of blatantly saying it, the fact actually added more meaning to the story -- does that even make sense?
Regardless, it's so refreshing to find an author who uses proper grammar and employs good writing technique. I will definitely be checking out some of your other work.
But until then, only 150 sleeps until Christmas!

This is definitely nothing like what I've read before. It does have nice flow to it, but has some minor errors. Simple runon sentences that could be easily fixed with a quick proofread. This short read is a good start to some practice. The characters are very down to earth and likable which is a need to a good story. (:

How wintery! I love it.

The writing here is great! The dialogue is perfection, the descriptions are done really well, and the characters are fleshed out in such a short piece! I'm not much of a partygoer myself, so I can relate to Alex's anti-social(ish) ways, haha.

The writing is super smooth and clear. Everything transitions very nicely from one line into the other. The dialogue is great because it sounds authentic, and really carries the story along in a seamless fashion.

The only thing that caught my eye, which may just be what happens when you paste in the text, was this part: “What are you doing?” Alex asked. Ian pointed up. “Mistletoe. That's really why I wanted you here. Because I love you and I wanted to kiss you under the mistletoe.”

"Ian pointed up... etc" should be it's own paragraph. Different speakers, different paragraphs.

Other than that, this was great! Such a cute little read :3

xxx Bee

This is such a cute story, i love it and Ian's such a sweetheart. Alex is such a Grinch though!! Anyway, i really love this. I didn't notice any spelling etc. mistakes, however i did feel as though the story moved a little fast but oneshots always do and should move at a faster pace. i really don't have anything bad to say about this!! good work :)