Aurora Woods - Comments

(Original fiction contest, sorry it's taken ages)(I've commented before but I'm doing a better comment and a re-read)
Prologue
Love the way this was started, very strong and very in detail. I'm guessing she is mortal living with elves who is also the keeper of the first light. But you did great with the detail.

One.
Such great detail, you could picture her falling from the sky and into the trees below. The way he describes her is just beautiful.
It occurred to be soon- did you mean "it occurred to me soon"
as her hand bloodless hand - did you mean " as her bloodless hand"
Oh he just decided to strip the poor half dead woman, how plesent lol. Like yup you touched my cheek so I will rip your clothing off. Lol. Oh you know, let me bite you after I just stripped you haha. What is this poor man thinking right now!?

Two.
I'm not gonna lie, I like the spark her Ma has. Like she's gotten used to her dying every night, so she's like don't sass me young lady you always die haha. I could only imagine just how confused she is,
A deep blush feathered by cheeks -A deep blush feathered my cheeks.
I do love the connection between her and Ren.

Three.
So I have this odd feeling he's "marked" her or is really in love with her now that he's done that. And now he's ditching his bethrothed. Oh man.

I really love where this is going, i do hope you keep going. I will be reading the rest of the entire soon, keep an out for winners. :)

Please tell me you will continue with this! I love the originality of this story and I would hate to see you give this up. It is so mysterious and intriguing.

Since you didn't have a one shot for me to comment on for my easter giveaway I decided to comment on this instead

I really like this, your imagery is amazing and the story is really well written as well. The mystery grows with each chapter, which in turn then keep the reader wanting more...this is a great start to something that I think is going to be amazing :) Good job

Okay, so I really like it but I'm a bit confused. She dies every night, right? But where was she falling from? Was that guy a werewolf that bit her? I really like this though and can't wait for another update.

What a great story!! I love reading a good fantasy story once in a while, and I've really enjoyed reading this. It left me with just enough questions for me to want to read more. What's the significance of her bite? Who was the person that bit her, and why did he do it? Why does Aurora have to leave? It's an exceptional start to a story!

The main things that stood out to me were the beautiful metaphors that you use in your description. Personally, description is something that I pay a lot of attention to, and the fact that you crafted yours so carefully and well really helps to give this story that extra mystical spark that often comes with fantasy.

There really isn't anything here that I can suggest hints for to improve on. It's all so good! Definitely recommending your story!

MMMMM!! I love it! I wish there was more to read! The mystery is killing me! I need to know precisely what she is, who Ren is and what the rest of the story will be.

Girl, this story is too good! I need more ;)

I don't know what the heck is going on. He/she is a vampire?

Well, I feel like he/she is creepy with the sudden biting and the odd "caressing" stuff. Haha, poor Aurora! I hope she's okay. :3

I am so sorry I haven't been reading your stuff lately! Please forgive me!

This story is by far one of the greatest I've read here on this writing site, and I can't believe I hadn't noticed it before. Shame on me!

The prologue alone is elegant, your description eerie and flawless. At the same time you don't overdo it and leave me to imagine all the eerie and fantastical things that are ahead in the story. MMM I love it!! Now on to the next chapters!

um whAAAAAAAAAAAAt the fuck?! she dies every night oh my goodness you are literally enticing everyone to read more
I NEED TO KNOW HOW UM WHAT
yeeeeeeeeesh why her ma gotta be so rude um???

There was a magical vibe to the beginning of this story that can only be found in fairy or folk tales. I am a sucker for all things mythology or share a common trait of, I liked the feeling this gave me overall. You have a way with words, to the point a reader may get lost in them, good and bad.

The beginning was very overwhelming to read and the fact that it was short didn't help, it was full of life and poetic language and very beautiful, but too much I personally thought and sometimes that may take away its beauty. Nonetheless, it was well written and you do set your readers up nicely.

I like this Aurora Woods, she sounds so mystical and that's the point, right? You do that well and it's hard to describe really, but it's good. This chapter was nice and the tone was good, for some reason, I liked it better than the prologue, but the prologue served its purpose, so I should not complain. But there is a sense of mystery with the man who has bitten Aurora and Aurora herself. I will tell you one thing I adored the most was how you described her birth, it put me in remind of the movie, "Pan's Labyrinth" one of my all time favorite movies.

"She had probably never seen the stars. Never lived a night in her entire extended lifetime." - I loved this line the most, I am not even a fairy tale creature and I can't even say the last time I truly looked and admired the stars, which is very sad in this day and age, you know. But the way they made her smile and gave her slight happiness made this story for me, I really liked that.

okay i am perplexed but very intrigued

AARON TVEIT BYE

First of all, I am sorry for this late comment. :c I am actually happy you recommended this story to me because I am more amazed at the fact that I enjoyed this more than I expected to. I have this weird fascination for goddesses/gods so this story was a big plus! And the fact that it involves werewolves makes me more excited to read on!

In the prologue, you had a killer hook. I also envy the way you take your scenes and describe them perfectly. The short prologue gives me (and other readers) an appeal to the story and makes me crave for more!

Shoot what just happened in the second chapter?! The suspense is killing me. The boy (who I think is a boy) bite Aurora, when he's forbidden to bite anyone or anything! That is interesting. Also I want to know why this creature bite Aurora. I wonder if it was an act to heal her? Besides that, I thought it was perfect.

The story layout made me quiet excited to read on, to be honest, because it is beautiful. I think you have a great story on your hands! Keep you the fantastic work! c:

omg wow this is amazing! I was intrigued by the title because I think the name Aurora is one of the most beautiful names ever and now I'm just in love with this story! It's so enticing!

Comment swap:

I have not read anything like this in a long time on here, and I'm already hooked off of two chapters. Your descriptions are amazing, making it easy to picture the scene and in the prologue, Aurora herself of course. I'm intrigued. Much like LaDeDanielle, I want to know why she fell, what her purpose is, and naturally who the stranger was that bit her...why he bit her and what he was actually supposed to do but didn't.

Comment swap:

I really like the title and how well it goes with the way the character was born. The way you described Aurora in the prologue was simply amazing. I love how your words flowed between each chapter. I really want to know what caused her fall and why the stranger just decided to take a bite into the beautiful creature. I really want to know more about Aurora and what she was created for and what she's done.

My word! The prologue alone was like nothing I had ever read before! Your descriptions are just so lovely and so amazing, of course this was easy to picture!

Jesus, the way you describe her fall is just. You leave me so breathless with this beautiful tale. I swear if I ever met you in person I would bow down to you and your creative descriptions.

I was not expecting this stranger to just suddenly rip into her like some sort of cannibalistic monster, that's for sure. I have so many questions about his motives and his actions and I just want to know what's going to happen to the girl who fell from the sky. This was just amazing. Absolutely amazing.

i'm sorry it took me awhile to reach your story! i still have a bit of studying to do!

but goddamn, i love every single one of the 200+ words in this prologue. i adore the way you describe her physical attributes, down to the littlest details, especially the similes that you used. they were all so beautiful. imagery game strong, babe.

oh and i absolutely love how you introduced the significance of her presence to the world. i don't know how you could deliver the grandness of her being the Goddess and Protector of Dawn, yet still reminded the readers of her mortality all in 200 words.

i'm so so in love with this! and jealous of you!

Holy cow! So, uh, please finish this? Seriously. Pick it back up. Your writing is fantastic. Please, please, please? I recommended and subscribed. (:

I love how you started this out! The mood and tone is already set in the beginning. It seems very dark, very fantastical, and very magical. Your similes are very grand, which is great, because it contributes to the majestic flair the Gods' presence. I think I saw one typo though! The first sentence of the second paragraph mentions the Gods fortress. I think you meant to make Gods possessive. Not sure if you meant plural possessive or not, but I'm guessing you would want to correct that to Gods' fortress unless that was intended. I love your imagery, though! And the layout is fantastic.