Forgotten - Comments

Fantastic start (:

You probably already know by now that the first thing I'm going to say is that I like the layout and the band you decided to quote for the summary. xD I'm still saying it again. I particularly really do like how the spots in the background of the banner play off of the dark and light combinations in the layout; it really works! And, of course, I can't complain about Evanescence.

Ha, I thoroughly enjoyed the opening, especially with Toshiro's bitter little comment. It's a decent way to introduce the characters and their relationship without explicitly stating that they're in a relationship, so I totally approve of this opening.

Eh, I'm never really a huge fan of the childhood-friend-being-jealous-of-the-new-girlfriend thing, but I'm overlooking that, because at least you said that Momo is respecting their relationship and everything. That's what really matters, after all.

I have to disagree with you, though; I don't think it's too slow of a start. I actually think it works best when the first chapter isn't full of craziness and too much plot; so I really like how this builded steadily. I think you've made a good foundation, and the rest of the story will easily be able to move forward from this.

I am also totally interested in what the World of the Living is, because I haven't heard of it before.

omg, the summary has evanscence lyrics. i love them & that song so much it just gave me really hardcore feels!

i really like the start of this. tho it is a bit slow, you can tell that the story is going to be building up to so much more. i adore the way miyu is totally nervous about going to the world of the living because she hasn't been there before, but i find that her nerves will make her more cautious as well as the whole ordeal a bit more exciting.

i think this was a great start & -- as always -- your writing leaves me completely awestruck. def coming back to check this out! can't wait for you to update!