Lullaby and Night Cries - Comments

Again, very interesting. The dialogue works much better now, too. Great update! Hope to see more soon!

B x

This is really interesting and a great start! Your attention to detail is really nice, as well. However, it would read much smoother if you separated the lines of dialogue. When you string them all together its difficult to distinguish who is saying what. Other than that, its great! I'm looking forward to more!

b x