Even from simply reading the first chapter of this story, I must say, I am highly impressed! I like the strange, and somewhat savage, twist you have given to the Elven species, who are usually depicted in fantasy series as so kind and meek. My only suggestion (though it's more of a wish, and purely personal) would be a bit stronger imagery in terms of scenery. Things like; what the sunlight looked like through the tree leaves, how the forest sounded, what it felt like (lush, breathing, whatever.) That being said, please focus less on the constructive criticism and more on the praise. You are very gifted at writing Fiction! The story line - or, what you have of it - seems very promising as well. I very much hope this progresses past the first chapter. You'll definitely find me reading more. Best Regards, Ike.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:06am
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I Always Felt So Cold in Your Company
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My only suggestion (though it's more of a wish, and purely personal) would be a bit stronger imagery in terms of scenery. Things like; what the sunlight looked like through the tree leaves, how the forest sounded, what it felt like (lush, breathing, whatever.) That being said, please focus less on the constructive criticism and more on the praise. You are very gifted at writing Fiction!
The story line - or, what you have of it - seems very promising as well. I very much hope this progresses past the first chapter. You'll definitely find me reading more.
Best Regards, Ike.