Welcome to the Family - Comments

Loving this! Please update again soon xxx

Super happy for an update glade you liked the construction feedback I will say with this one you had a few mistakes but not many and I just feel like it should have been in one or the others pov maybe not both but I do enjoy seeing how these two interact with others and am curious for how it will be with out them being alone in like public and what not.

Much ♡ Kat

@Mrs.Katsumi.Grinch

Thank you! Seriously, I love getting constructive advice! It helps a heck of a lot more than some people think.

Chapter 1
Alright so far I like this and I'm just a few paragraphs in but, I like it already though I'm curious to who this Fran is? I mean I am thinking social worker since she is making it sound like its her job to get this angry child on a plane, but she seems like she may possibly know Elan and this has me curious....

I did find a mistake here in chapter one you wrote do when I think or least it seems like you meant to write to. And possibly you may want to put something in that people know the story is switching to some one else like a story breaker.

I like how you've made the whole Avenged group seem so much like a family and how they where quick to help with cooking and no one seemed to voice it if they thought it bad for the band or anything like that, I can no wait to see what happens next.

Chapter 2
So I'm bout part way through this chapter and I just don't like how she's went from being so angry in a meer four days to being okay just because Brian is famous,
I'm still not feeling how she just seem so happy all of a sudden and her whole family is gone but Brian who she honestly knows very little about so far I'm hoping this is just some shock to having her fave band take her in cause I really liked where you was going with her emotions.
And I absolutly adore how Vengance just assumed it was a little girl and is now kind of aww struck himself.
"Hey guys, I'm going to take her to bed, okay?" Zack said while picking Elena up."Thanks Bri, that's really nice of you." Michelle said, cuddling closer to Brian.

I'm assuming you might have meant Zacky there if not this may be confusing to some people. I noticed a few other smaller mistakes like she was in a bed then you said she was on the floor. Other then that my only thing is how fast everything seems to be happaning and with Ellie not processing much.

Chapter 3
This chapter really really really, did I say really disapointed me length wise it was very short for such a chunch of time to have passed but I like how she seems to be doing okay yet still feeling for the lose of her family but coming in to accepting her new family minus vengance but I get why he is keeping his distance.

Though I do have to say I've been wondering since chapter two just if she still has her V card or not, I mean in two she practically stripped and begged for it sort of as a tease, but here in three she is wondering if she did something wrong. Is she just doing all this because of the grife and what not or does she know what she is doing?

I'm sorry about your mom, and like if you need to talk you can feel free to message me, I know I'm a stranger but just like writing this helps possibly talking to a stranger could help to. I'm glad your getting your feelings out in a healthy way unlike how some people would be dealing with something like this, I hope things get better for you dear.

Chapter 4
I like this chapter and honestly I don't have much to say about it other then I don't like how she may be going to use a boy who deff isn't going to be in to her just to hurt Vengance who never actually said he slept with anyone just went and seen strippers after he clearly stated Brian told him to fo away.
Either way this story is getting better and better and I like it.

Chapter 5
I'm loving Vengance pov and finding out about him and Gina and seeing him actually open up to some one its a good thing, but I'm wondering if openly admiting that he almost had sex with Ellie is such a good idea. I mean she obviously hasn't said anything to anyone, and Brian and Chell obviously only could have heart the talking... Why do I feel he is getting himself in to deeper water.
Or I could have been really wrong, and Crist could be in suppourt of this which I think is a little odd but then what ever I'm really intrested in seeing where this goes now hope you update soon please?

Much <3 Kat

yay an update!

@AJ9 I am totally going to update soon!

Update soon cos I'm excited to find out what'll happen next xxx

@K.Shadows Thank you so much! I'm on my way to another update.

@AJ9 Yes I have returned! haha and I shall :)

You're back! Yay Yay! I'm loving this and can't wait for more. Please update soon xxx

I like this! And I need more updates!

@ a007kayl
If you need any help just message me! :)

@ signoralala
thanks hun! I would love a layout. I used to dabble in them about 4 years ago but now i'm actually going to learn it but right now, i know zilch about it.

and thanks for always being here for me :D

I really loved this update.
And, girl. I am so sorry about your momma.
I know that I couldn't handle that. I would be losing my mind.
You are strong! I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.
I'm always here, girl. Just a message away!

And, keep up the good work!
If you ever want a layout I'd be honored to help out!
I'm not the best. But, I can try my best!

@akmo4725 thanks so much!! it's gonna get crazy
@AJ9 you're too sweet. i'm going to try to update soon :D

I absolutely love this story and I can't wait to read more of it. I am so sorry about your mum. That must be horrible. Take care and update again when you can. xxx

This story is amazing ready. It almost made me cry seeing and feeling her reaction to why she chose that book. I'm glad Jimmy is there for her. I wonder what's going to happen when she sees zacky again

@signoralala thanks! i'm really loving this story!
@Jenna_A7X :D
@NikkiFoxy8 Thanks! I so want to update again and I just barely did!
@Rick Grimes; thanks! I will update quickly!

Thank you so much you guys! I can't believe so many people actually like my writing!

This chapter was so cute!