Feeling You - Comments

Layout & Summary: The layout is simple & it makes it for an easy read. The summary drew me in & I certainly was interested in reading more. I love the quote you used as well.

The Story: Honestly, it's scary how life can change in just a blink of an eye. One minute you can have the world & The next it can be taken away from you. The first paragraph certainly drew me in. I do like how descriptive you were, it really helps paint the picture in your mind. I really felt bad for him. He had nothing. I'm glad Nora stuck by his side even though he tried to push her away.

Her words were my saving grace because while I didn’t want to live for myself, I would find a way to live for her. Just as she had found a way to stay strong for me. This was the perfect way to end it. I'm glad he decided to get his act together thanks to Nora. I love the relationship they have. I'm sensing something more in the future.

But overall, well done!

Also, apparently Mibba is crazy. I don't know why this posted 3 times. Sorry.

First of all, oh my god, this was spectacular! I'd like to repeat what everyone else said and tell you that the layout is beautiful! It's not flashy, so it doesn't distract me from the story, but it's... I don't know, it's just beautiful! A picture says a thousand words.

There a few grammar things, which don't really take away from the story at all, but one that I didn't see pointed out (unless I missed it) was when you said face-paced instead of fast paced in talking about his job.

I want to know more about Nora! Have they been dating a long time or is she a family friend? How did they meet? Why does she love him so much? I'm fascinated. And I'm so smitten with the idea of her sort of rescuing him from his own personal hell. I'm definitely interested in seeing where this goes.

I'm obsessed with this layout. It's so simple yet so beautiful.

But onto the story, this is so sad to begin with wtf. This is something I'd see in Grey's Anatomy, where the main character's entire family is dead. Poor guy. Nora sounds lovely. It's sweet that she's been there for him through all of this, it must be hard to shoulder all of that. What a great person. While it's depressing that he can't live for himself, I guess there's a glimmer hope of him living for Nora. Maybe he can find a way to live for himself through that. Nora seems like the person who'd get him to do that.

One thing I would have liked to see in this story (just as a supplement) is more background on Nora and their relationship, just because the end seemed a little rushed. He went straight from wanting to kill himself to not. It'd be interesting to see more thought process behind that decision. But other than that, this was great!

Like PP said just those two things I noticed.

But I loved it. You captured the sadness of both characters in just a short chapter, so much that I started to get sad.

Repost again

Repost, sorry

Layout + Summary
UGH! The layout is beautiful. I love how it just fits so well with the title. I don't know, I just love it.

And th summary made me go Awww.

Chapter: I.

A blink of an eye was all it too
^took

as she wandered over to him slowly
^me? I don't know, you changed view points here

UGH! Rip my heart out, why don't you? But seriously, this is beautiful. Sorrowful, but lovely.

I had a friend named Nora once and she passed away in a freak fire accident, so I was a little happy seeing her name here. She would have been the kind of person able to do that, to pull someone from their pain.

And I feel so sad for him. I've lost my Grams and fell into a deep depression with similar thoughts to his in the story, so that hits home as well.

But the story is written beautiful. You set up the scene perfectly, detailing it just enough to paint the image in my mind. I wanted to cry reading this.

Okay first off, this layout is beautiful. That immediately drew me in. I think this story, while short, is developed really well. You did a great job of giving a lot of backstory and information in a way that felt really natural and not super forced, which happens a lot in short stories. My only critique is that there are some type-o's and some sentences that are a little clunky, but nothing a little read through won't fix. Great story!