the layout is so simple & happy looking, i can't help but feel happy looking @ it. so you can assume i've just been smiling all stupidly @ my laptop for the past ten mins *clears throat bc supposed to be cool*
i really love the descriptive imagery you put into this piece. it's wonderfully written & tells a tale w/o any dialogue which is phenomenal on your part. you don't overbear us w/ giant info dumps which is the mistake of many author's. & to follow it up, it's like im part of the soul-sucking monsters of this kingdom listening to this tale from some elder that speaks of why the kingdom joy & her king had abandoned is now manifesting off hate & greed.
though i did see some grammar mistakes, this could all be fixed w/ a quick proofread & it didn't stand out or distract from the piece. great job, really!
i really love the descriptive imagery you put into this piece. it's wonderfully written & tells a tale w/o any dialogue which is phenomenal on your part. you don't overbear us w/ giant info dumps which is the mistake of many author's. & to follow it up, it's like im part of the soul-sucking monsters of this kingdom listening to this tale from some elder that speaks of why the kingdom joy & her king had abandoned is now manifesting off hate & greed.
though i did see some grammar mistakes, this could all be fixed w/ a quick proofread & it didn't stand out or distract from the piece. great job, really!