March 22nd, 2019 at 09:55pm
This is a good story with so much potential. However, there are a few things to point out.
1. In second chapter, when Lexi went to school and she was talking about Bella and the Cullens, I was confused. Because in the first chapter, it wa mentioned that she had just moved to Forks. Understandable for her to know the Qiulettes since her father was one. But how did she know of the Cullens and Bella since she had just moved?
2. Throughout the first and second chapters, she was introduced as Lexi and then came third chapter, she became Alexis. I was probably knitpicking but this inconsistency is a little bit confusing.
Aside from those points I made above, I do feel like this story has good potential to move forward. I'm definitely curious to know more about Lexi and her nightmares. Does her half Qiulette side give her the ability to predict the future, make a prophecy? Anything bad looming in the horizon for the pack?
Anyway, keep up the good work!
Thank you for pointing out the name situation, Alexis was the name I was using in my first draft.
The first paragraph in the first chapter mentions how Lexi felt when first being told about moving to Folks, they have actually been in Folks a little while and so Lexi has gotten to know people. I hope this clears up a little of your confusion.