Guitarist and the orphan - Comments

  • Call Me A Sinner

    Call Me A Sinner (100)

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    i like it a lot. the idea is really interesting! keep it up!!
    August 2nd, 2008 at 06:19pm
  • Flynn Rider

    Flynn Rider (300)

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    - i'm going on all read anything i find interesting -

    I agree with iMaggie, the story and plot are great
    just watch your grammar, yes.. editors here are
    grammar nazi's because they're helping us (:

    nice story, by the way.
    August 1st, 2008 at 06:34pm
  • monica.

    monica. (100)

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    D:
    Why must the good die young.
    July 31st, 2008 at 07:20am
  • AshleyCrashly

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    im depressed!!!

    lmao i cant belive it!!! TT-TT

    it was really good, i wonna see how the next one turns out!! ^-^
    July 30th, 2008 at 11:56pm
  • VampireRomance101

    VampireRomance101 (100)

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    It's really good. =)
    Can't wait for more.
    July 30th, 2008 at 09:05pm
  • Rovvy;

    Rovvy; (100)

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    I'm improving .

    =D
    July 30th, 2008 at 08:26pm
  • iMaggie

    iMaggie (400)

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    It's coming along. :D
    The only advice I have it grammer.
    Keep it up!

    -Maggie-
    July 30th, 2008 at 08:13pm
  • kojack_x

    kojack_x (150)

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    WHOO ! ROVVY! You're story rocks ^__^
    July 30th, 2008 at 05:27am
  • monica.

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    Ommmgahhhddd.
    I read 2&3.It almost made me tear.ferreals.
    She's aliveeeee.
    :']

    This is as good as watching the secret life of an american teenager.
    xD
    July 30th, 2008 at 01:55am
  • bodysnatcherr.

    bodysnatcherr. (100)

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    This has very good potential. You did a great good in the first chapter with the first paragraph. The way you described things is great. But sadly I don't do hetero fics. :( But this like I said has great potential so you better not stop writing it. : D
    July 29th, 2008 at 09:59pm
  • Twilightaholic

    Twilightaholic (100)

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    Wow, this one is really good x I can't wait till the next chapter x
    July 29th, 2008 at 07:53pm
  • iMaggie

    iMaggie (400)

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    I like where this is going, the only advice I have no is to watch for grammer. Like...go back and see where the quotations are put. It's really hard to see what is being said verses the actions. Keep it up!
    July 29th, 2008 at 06:51pm
  • monica.

    monica. (100)

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    D:

    I like this.
    :]
    Its soo sad.
    DD:
    Sad for the future husband.
    Can't wait for more.
    :DD
    July 29th, 2008 at 11:01am
  • blueangelsvntn

    blueangelsvntn (100)

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    It seems pretty good so far! Can't wait to see what the next chapter will be like :D
    July 29th, 2008 at 08:28am
  • iumagat

    iumagat (100)

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    Wow nice story first time i had the tendacy to read some thing that long!!

    THAT WAS VERY INTERESTING AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE!!!
    July 29th, 2008 at 12:05am
  • Twilightaholic

    Twilightaholic (100)

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    I love the idea, and ur style x

    Just slow things down a bit, that's the only thing I would say x
    otherwise, thumbs up!
    July 28th, 2008 at 10:47pm
  • The Muffin

    The Muffin (200)

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    This is totally different than the stories I usually see on Mibba... I like how you began. Can't wait for more =)
    July 28th, 2008 at 08:02pm
  • lynx

    lynx (100)

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    wow a lot more descriptive, i really like it. the intro was sad and it had just enough hook to make me want to read more.
    July 28th, 2008 at 07:37pm
  • Nixie

    Nixie (100)

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    T_T That's sad! But it's good :]]
    I agree with iMaggie; I think it's better than the other one too. XD
    July 28th, 2008 at 07:13pm
  • iMaggie

    iMaggie (400)

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    I have to say, this is much better than the one before. I love the idea, and how you described things. But you still need to slow things down a bit. The fire just hit me, I didn't know what happened.

    Go inside the thoughts of the man, and tell exactly what he thinks. It would be really cool if you included a flashback at the very beginning. Maybe of how they met or a conversaton they had?

    It's coming along. Keep it up!

    -Maggie-
    July 28th, 2008 at 07:00pm