Wow. >_> And I mean that with all due repsect. Fucking wow. Just... yeah. This piece held so much emotion that you really can't contain yourself reading this.
Firstly, I loved your descriptions such as heartbroken red and panic was creeping over his brain. And just the adjectives you used to define the characters' personality. I mean, ususally adjectives are used to describe moments but here I sensed it helped to outline both Billie and Tre's characters during the whole piece and the changes they went through.
In Tre you can feel this coldness, this harshness that seems unjustified at first but then it seems... odd and somewhat warped since he's inflicting harm on both his body and sanity just to hurt Billie. And I think it's kind of his way to channel all the rage and anger inwardly. Because if he hurt Billie, Billie wouldn't really do anything about it except hurt physically, while if he hurt himself the physical pain wouldn't matter since the emotional pain is much worse, and plus: it'd hurt Billie more than it'd hurt him already. Bodily wounds heal but the gashes in the soul won't. [I hope that made sense >_<]
While at Billie, you can just sense his guilt from the start, from his softspoken words to his gentle mannerism. And you can really tell how it's just not him; there's a reason why he's being like that. He's brokenhearted, yet, not really that broken in the same time. There's certain undertones of desperation in him that he's repressing. You know how when you try to stop a river from flowing, but knowing you'll never will?
Also, I don't think that it doesn't make sense. Just that it leaves open questions where the reader fills in the blanks by inferring and that's okay. Because, personally, I had to build a subplot/or semi-prolouge in my brain as I continued reading. Actually, I think what any well-written piece needs is a point where all the ends meet and somehow this one you have to sew your own ends together at the end.
About the plot itself: It's really not Billie's fault in the end... but it is if you really think about it. I mean it's not his fault if Tre can't let go of the past [and past -or current?- lovers] but at the end of the piece you tend to realize that they're not right for each other even though they love one another [though you tend to question Tre's love in the end; did it turn to hate or was it really because he loved Billie too much?]. Oh and I loved their dialogue so much; it was... real, you know? You can actually imagine two people having that conversation and pulling it off with the same amount of emotions. [And I liked the personal touch you added to the dialogue with Billie calling Tre Frank and Tre's line 'Sing for me Billie Joe.' because you can feel that he's wounded. You really can.]
Anyways, I loved reading this :cute: I haven't read Green Day slash in a long long time and I'm glad that I read this. Because these days I really tend to get moved by what I read and you did just that. This'll stick with me for a while for sure :arms: You're an amazing writer, love :cute:
Actually this made perfect sense to me. I absolutely love the way that you wrote this. I can definitely see the pain that Billie Joe and Tre are in, and it hurts me. :hug: :hug: :hug:
And I mean that with all due repsect. Fucking wow.
Just... yeah. This piece held so much emotion that you really can't contain yourself reading this.
Firstly, I loved your descriptions such as heartbroken red and panic was creeping over his brain. And just the adjectives you used to define the characters' personality. I mean, ususally adjectives are used to describe moments but here I sensed it helped to outline both Billie and Tre's characters during the whole piece and the changes they went through.
In Tre you can feel this coldness, this harshness that seems unjustified at first but then it seems... odd and somewhat warped since he's inflicting harm on both his body and sanity just to hurt Billie. And I think it's kind of his way to channel all the rage and anger inwardly. Because if he hurt Billie, Billie wouldn't really do anything about it except hurt physically, while if he hurt himself the physical pain wouldn't matter since the emotional pain is much worse, and plus: it'd hurt Billie more than it'd hurt him already. Bodily wounds heal but the gashes in the soul won't. [I hope that made sense >_<]
While at Billie, you can just sense his guilt from the start, from his softspoken words to his gentle mannerism. And you can really tell how it's just not him; there's a reason why he's being like that. He's brokenhearted, yet, not really that broken in the same time. There's certain undertones of desperation in him that he's repressing. You know how when you try to stop a river from flowing, but knowing you'll never will?
Also, I don't think that it doesn't make sense. Just that it leaves open questions where the reader fills in the blanks by inferring and that's okay. Because, personally, I had to build a subplot/or semi-prolouge in my brain as I continued reading. Actually, I think what any well-written piece needs is a point where all the ends meet and somehow this one you have to sew your own ends together at the end.
About the plot itself: It's really not Billie's fault in the end... but it is if you really think about it. I mean it's not his fault if Tre can't let go of the past [and past -or current?- lovers] but at the end of the piece you tend to realize that they're not right for each other even though they love one another [though you tend to question Tre's love in the end; did it turn to hate or was it really because he loved Billie too much?]. Oh and I loved their dialogue so much; it was... real, you know? You can actually imagine two people having that conversation and pulling it off with the same amount of emotions. [And I liked the personal touch you added to the dialogue with Billie calling Tre Frank and Tre's line 'Sing for me Billie Joe.' because you can feel that he's wounded. You really can.]
Anyways, I loved reading this :cute: I haven't read Green Day slash in a long long time and I'm glad that I read this. Because these days I really tend to get moved by what I read and you did just that. This'll stick with me for a while for sure :arms: You're an amazing writer, love :cute: