Reread this whole story. I unfortunately kept getting irritated because of the misspelling and typos (I apologize for bringing them up, but you know how I am) Other then that, it was an absolutely fucking fantastic story. Think there could have been more POVs with Jaymii and Frankie as a couple. Also, you made Jaymii seem heartless. She stopped going to the hospital? There was one time that she admitted to missing Axel..Only one time? She couldn't have been zoomed in on at a really bad time? It could use some more Bob and Ray time too..They just seem like they don't even belong in this here story. Hmm, I am looking forward to the chapter(s) to come whenever you get around to it. *Thinks* There should definitely at least be a little party for Jaymii and Axel, obviously mostly centered on Axel but still. 21 is a big thing. A good dinner out at a favorite restaurant. Gee and Frankie singing Happy Birthday? Maybe Jaymii has something up her sleeve for Axel?? Anyways, hope this feedback/rambling comment help. <3 it!
June 19th, 2013 at 04:07am
