California Love A7X

Its early. Really early. Or really late depending on you look at things. Two in the morning. I'm outside in the cool night. You never realize how scary the dark is until your surrounded by it. I clutched Matts hoodie closer. My eyes darted around quickly. Looking in any direction a sound came from. I would be scolded for this but that's ok. A breeze blew lightly. Sending a shiver down my spine. Maybe choosing to do this so late wasn't a good idea. Perhapes waiting till it was lighter out wouldn't have been a bad idea. I squinted and there it was. My destination. I slipped my. hand into a pocket and pulled out some keys. As quietly as I could I unlocked the door. Waiting a second before I opened it. Carefully I pushed it open. Scratching little feet and jingling of a collar let me know the house pet was aware of me. I made my way to the stair case. A quiet growl filled the air.

Melly: shhhhh Icky. Its me, Melly.

I held my hand out. He sniffed it and licked my fingers. I scratched his head. He followed me. I looked at the different doors. You'd think at this point for as long as I've been here I'd know which room. Truth of the fact is I've never really hung out at this house. Its always been easier to avoid it. Better to stay far away from Zacky. My only option at this point is to just go for it. Any door to start. First door to the left. Closet. Figures. Second door to the left. I hesitaited. Something told me to skip it, so I did. I decided for the door directly across it. Second door on the right. I opened it. His dark hair was all over the place. His perfect body exposed for me to see. I closed to door behind me gently. Not letting Icky in. I took off the hoodie. It was hot in this house. My feet carried me to his bed. I took a deep breath. Carefully I sat on the bed. When I saw no reaction I knew he was out cold. I laid next to him and snuggled close to him. So warm. I took another deep breath. I sighed happily. Cigs and booze... I couldn't sleep. Even though my eyes would close. Sleep would not find them. I was comfortable though. The room gradually got lighter and lighter. Allowing me to see the room better. I ran one finger down his side. Then slowly back up. It was weird. He went rigid. Still. He wasn't moving to begin with but he was more still if possible. Carefully I removed my finger. My breathing slow and cautious. His actions suprised me. After a second he started to stretch out. As if to feel his way around me. His leg touched mine briefly. Pulling away just as quick as they met. He was tense again. I knew he was awake now. Something was off. His body language told me so.

Melly: Johnny.

If it was possible he went more tense. This worried me. Had I done something wrong? Had I made him uncomfortable maybe? His breathing became heavy. I placed a hand on his back. He flinched. I removed it. I didn't know what to do. So I just laid there. He sat up back to me.

Melly: Johnny. What's wrong?

I sat up and made him face me. He looked confused.

Melly: Johnny?

Johnny: I didn't recognize your voice...I thought.

Melly: you thought?

Johnny: I thought you were...

Melly: I was?

Johnny: some random girl.

Melly: some random girl?

Johnny: yes...

Melly: that you brought home?

Johnny: I was about to die if you were...hate myself.

He shook his head.

Melly: why would you think I was some...

Johnny: I've been drinking to much the past few days. Nights. Whatever.

Melly: why have you been drinking so much?

He shrugged.

Johnny: habit I guess. Your voice Melly.

I grabbed my throat.

Melly: yes, its very dry and I sound like a frog.

Johnny: are you sick?

Melly: result of dehydration and dry heaving.

Johnny: Melly when did you get here? How did you get here?

Melly: I got here a few hours ago and I walked.

He shook his head.

Melly: why haven't you come to see me?

His eyes looked over my face.

Johnny: I don't have any excuses...

He looked away.

Melly: the last person I'd want to see was the first to look for me. The first person I wanted to see I had to come find.

Johnny: I know, I've no excuses Melly.

I threw my arms around him.

Melly: I've been waiting Johnny. I needed you.

His arms went around me.

Melly: but you weren't there.

I got as close as possible. Pressing myself against him.

Melly: Johnny I always need you. You make me feel better. You don't even have to say anything. Just this. Sitting by you is good enough.

Johnny: Melly please don't cry.

I hadn't even realized I was.

Johnny: I was told you didn't want to see anyone.

Melly: so?

He sighed.

Johnny: I'm with you now.

Melly: yes...

Hushed talking woke me. Must be early evening. It was a little hard for me to tell if the talking was in the room or just outside.

Zacky: she can't stay here.

Johnny: what? Did you want me to kick her out?

Zacky: yeah.

Johnny: no way dude.

Zacky: she can't stay here. Sorry Johnny she can't.

Johnny: well I'm not making her leave. You're guys spat was between you and her. Not me and you. And not me and her.

Zacky: fooled me Johnny boy. With the fucking scolding I got from you that night, sure felt like it was between you and me.

Johnny: whatever.

Zacky: Johnny she can't stay here. Done.

Johnny: to bad.

Zacky: no to bad for you. This is my fucking house buddy. I have the final fucking say. She goes.

He said firmly but never breaking the smooth texture of his voice.

Johnny: I thought we were best friends Zack. I thought that's the whole reason you even asked me to come live here.

Zacky: it is. She on the other hand can't.

Johnny: fine I'll just leave with her...

Zacky: suit yourself dude.

I heard footsteps fade away from the room. I remained still as I heard him enter the room. I sat up and looked at Johnny. He looked a bit suprised.

Melly: this whole thing is rediculous.

Johnny: you heard?

Melly: some. Its just stupid.

Johnny: that's what I said. Its not like he has to see you. Don't listen to hi-

Melly: I can't be here anymore.

Johnny: Melly Mel. You can stay. He's not going to do anything. He's just got his panties in a bunch is all.

Melly: no that's not what I'm talking about.

He looked at me confused.

Melly: the bullshit between me and him. What's going on. Its stupid. I'm sorry. I've got to go. I've got to see my cousin.

Johnny: don't leave.

Melly: you don't understand Johnny. I'm sorry.

I got out of the bed and straightened out.

Johnny: I'm confused. What are we talking about?

Melly: clearly not about the same things.

I slipped on the random shoes I had worn.

Johnny: Melly don't be upset over him anymore.

Melly: I'm not Johnny.

He gave me a look.

Melly: I'm really not.

He looked at me. I couldn't. Not anymore. I fought back the lump in my throat.

Melly: I love you. So much...

I had to catch my breath. It just hurt. To know. I looked away and blinked away some tears. When I looked back he seemed bewildered. And concerned. I hugged him so close it was impossible. This was the most important embrace me and him could ever share. The most. He wrapped his arms around me. And before he could even say anything I kissed those lips.

Melly: I'm sorry.

I ran out the door. Down the stairs. To the front door and outside. Down the sidewalk. Blocks and blocks. Not bothering to look anywhere but straight. My cheeks were wet with tears. Until I finally reached that huge house. I barged inside. Todd came running to me. Barking excitedly.

Jimmy: MELIFUS!!

He said happily.

Jimmy: Melly? What's wrong?

Brian: who's here?

I looked at my cousin and just shook my head. He quickly rushed to me and wrapped his arms around me.

Melly: I've got to go Brian.

Brian: you just got here.

Melly: I've got to go. I can't be here anymore Brian.

Brian: but Melly. You just walked-

Melly: No. Brian. I can't be here anymore.

I shook my head.

Brian: you just.

He just stopped. The look in his eyes. He knew what I meant.

Melly: no goodbyes. I need to leave. I'm unhappy here. So unhappy. I've no job, I mooch off my cousin, and I hate your friends.

Brian: Melly that's not true.

Melly: I'm unhappy! Can't you see! Look at my face!

Jimmy: what about Johnny?

Melly: Fuck Johnny.

Tears rolled down my face.