The Hardest Part Is Letting Go of Your Dreams
1-2-1-2-3-4!
* Zanda's POV *
As I walked out on stage to loud cheers and whistles I took deep, calming breaths. In....out. In.........out. Good. We got our places and adjusted the mics to our tall, tall, short,short heights. I observe the weirdedst things when i'm nervous, sue me! OK, calmness, calmness.
"How you doin' today?" I said into the microphone, greeting the crowd. " I wanna hear give another round of applause for My Chemical Romance 'cause they were amazing! " I was slowly starting to feel OK. I remember thinking late at night about " stage etiquette " when I was younger. I was a weird kid.
"Okay, we are After FX and we're hear to rock it out!!" After I said this, I turned to Tay and nodded once. I turned back to face the crowd as I hear her counting off with her drumsticks.
"1-2-1-2-3-4!"
I heard the chords blending together like they were supposed to and the screams of the crowd as the intro came to a close and i started to sing.
"I might just be a waste.
so why don't you say it to my face?
Why can't you understand?
What you see is who I am!
Scared of moving.
Desperate for proving.
Inside I'm dying!
So Why am I even trying?!?"
Oh, fuck what are the words to the chorus? oh, yeah!
"Don't pretend you love me!
I can see it in your eyes
When you look into mine.
I can't forget the past.
That chance was your last.
Do you care if I run and hide?
'Cause i'm screamin' on the inside!"
You're doing fine. We sound great. I shot a nervous glance at Jazz to my left, ripping up that guitar! I have great bandmembers.
"So blind to what you see.
You can't see how much you're hurting me!
Tired after every fight.
Tired of pretending to be alright.
Always bleeding.
Never succeeding.
Together forever!
Seems like never!
"Don't Pretend you love me.
I can see it in your eyes
When you look into mine.
I can't forget the past.
That chance was your last.
Do you care if I run and hide?
'Cause i'm screamin' on the inside!"
I lowered my voice just above a murmur. I love this part!
"You seem so far away.
I don't know who you are any..."
'LOUD!' I thought
"MORE!!"
Wow the crowd got loud at that.
"I'm sitting alone screaming on the insssssiiiiiiiiiddddee!!
On the insssssiiiiiiiiiiiddddee!!
Inside my sssoooooouuuuuuuulllll!!!"
We played two more songs after that with more nervous glances to eachother until the third when we finally felt really confident.
As I looked out into the crowd I saw 'Gerard' and his band watching us. The other three guys were nodding to the beat, but 'Gerard' and that one guy were just staring at me. I remembered how weird it was to meet someone who was in your dreams and you'd never met before. I guess I zoned out as I continued to sing because Keel came over with her bass and said, "Come on! Put the feeling back in to it!" into my ear.
So I did, I guess because Keel didn't talk to me the rest of the show.
*Franks POV*
I stood there in the crowd with Gerard, Ray, Mikey, and Bob, listening to After FX. Her band. ' She has a really nice voice. And thoses lyrics! Did she write them herself? ' I thought. This is not normal on any standards!
Gee's hand touched mine. Was it on purpose? No. 'He doesn't love you like that, jackass.' I thought to myself.
When 'Jazz' looked over at me I felt weird. There was a lurch in my stomach. I've felt that lurch before. It's that same lurch I used to have every time Gerard looked at me. I still melt inside every time he smiles at me, but that lurch was outgrown a while back. I should give up on Gerard. He obviously only likes me as a friend or brother. Nothing more.
* Jazz's POV *
As we walked off stage, I felt pretty good. We walked around and somehow met up with that one band, My Chemical Romance. I invited them onto our ' bus ' and we talked for a while. Well, me, Keel, and Tay to who we learned were Ray, Bob, and MIkey. the other two weren't talking and neither was Zanda. Odd.
"Z, what the fuck is your problem?" I asked her.
"I honestly don't know," she said. Yeah, right.
"Don't give me that, I know you," I accused.
"I need to find my shoes," Zanda said. She walked back to the buck areaand said, "I need someone short!"
"He can help you there," said Ray pushing the shorter of the no-talky guys into the bunk are and coming back to us.
* Zanda's POV *
'Gerard' came back to the bunks.
"Hey," I said.
"Hey."
"What's happening?" I said getting to the point.
"I don't know. Should we get Gee back here?"
"Gee?" Who's he?
"Gee!!" he yelled. I covered my ears.He's loud.
That one guy who watched us in the dream came back with his hand over his eyes. "If you're naked again, I'm totally gonna kick your ass as sound as you get pants on" he said.
"I don't even wanna know." I said.
"It's safe, retard." ' Gerard ' said.
"I think we should start over new." I said.
"Good idea. I guess I should formally introduce myself then. Hi, I'm Frank and I play guitar in the band, My Chamical Romance."
"Ok then, hey, my name's Gerard," I looked at Frank then back to the real Gerard. "and I sing with my beautiful voice in the band, My Chamical Romance," he finished.
"And you are....?" asked Frank. ( it's nice to know his real name! )
"I, my good fellow," I said in my best brittish accent. "am Zandalee. I sing with my prettier-than-Gerard's-voice in the band After FX." We laughed and I grabbed both of their hands and led them back to the front of the bus.
As I walked out on stage to loud cheers and whistles I took deep, calming breaths. In....out. In.........out. Good. We got our places and adjusted the mics to our tall, tall, short,short heights. I observe the weirdedst things when i'm nervous, sue me! OK, calmness, calmness.
"How you doin' today?" I said into the microphone, greeting the crowd. " I wanna hear give another round of applause for My Chemical Romance 'cause they were amazing! " I was slowly starting to feel OK. I remember thinking late at night about " stage etiquette " when I was younger. I was a weird kid.
"Okay, we are After FX and we're hear to rock it out!!" After I said this, I turned to Tay and nodded once. I turned back to face the crowd as I hear her counting off with her drumsticks.
"1-2-1-2-3-4!"
I heard the chords blending together like they were supposed to and the screams of the crowd as the intro came to a close and i started to sing.
"I might just be a waste.
so why don't you say it to my face?
Why can't you understand?
What you see is who I am!
Scared of moving.
Desperate for proving.
Inside I'm dying!
So Why am I even trying?!?"
Oh, fuck what are the words to the chorus? oh, yeah!
"Don't pretend you love me!
I can see it in your eyes
When you look into mine.
I can't forget the past.
That chance was your last.
Do you care if I run and hide?
'Cause i'm screamin' on the inside!"
You're doing fine. We sound great. I shot a nervous glance at Jazz to my left, ripping up that guitar! I have great bandmembers.
"So blind to what you see.
You can't see how much you're hurting me!
Tired after every fight.
Tired of pretending to be alright.
Always bleeding.
Never succeeding.
Together forever!
Seems like never!
"Don't Pretend you love me.
I can see it in your eyes
When you look into mine.
I can't forget the past.
That chance was your last.
Do you care if I run and hide?
'Cause i'm screamin' on the inside!"
I lowered my voice just above a murmur. I love this part!
"You seem so far away.
I don't know who you are any..."
'LOUD!' I thought
"MORE!!"
Wow the crowd got loud at that.
"I'm sitting alone screaming on the insssssiiiiiiiiiddddee!!
On the insssssiiiiiiiiiiiddddee!!
Inside my sssoooooouuuuuuuulllll!!!"
We played two more songs after that with more nervous glances to eachother until the third when we finally felt really confident.
As I looked out into the crowd I saw 'Gerard' and his band watching us. The other three guys were nodding to the beat, but 'Gerard' and that one guy were just staring at me. I remembered how weird it was to meet someone who was in your dreams and you'd never met before. I guess I zoned out as I continued to sing because Keel came over with her bass and said, "Come on! Put the feeling back in to it!" into my ear.
So I did, I guess because Keel didn't talk to me the rest of the show.
*Franks POV*
I stood there in the crowd with Gerard, Ray, Mikey, and Bob, listening to After FX. Her band. ' She has a really nice voice. And thoses lyrics! Did she write them herself? ' I thought. This is not normal on any standards!
Gee's hand touched mine. Was it on purpose? No. 'He doesn't love you like that, jackass.' I thought to myself.
When 'Jazz' looked over at me I felt weird. There was a lurch in my stomach. I've felt that lurch before. It's that same lurch I used to have every time Gerard looked at me. I still melt inside every time he smiles at me, but that lurch was outgrown a while back. I should give up on Gerard. He obviously only likes me as a friend or brother. Nothing more.
* Jazz's POV *
As we walked off stage, I felt pretty good. We walked around and somehow met up with that one band, My Chemical Romance. I invited them onto our ' bus ' and we talked for a while. Well, me, Keel, and Tay to who we learned were Ray, Bob, and MIkey. the other two weren't talking and neither was Zanda. Odd.
"Z, what the fuck is your problem?" I asked her.
"I honestly don't know," she said. Yeah, right.
"Don't give me that, I know you," I accused.
"I need to find my shoes," Zanda said. She walked back to the buck areaand said, "I need someone short!"
"He can help you there," said Ray pushing the shorter of the no-talky guys into the bunk are and coming back to us.
* Zanda's POV *
'Gerard' came back to the bunks.
"Hey," I said.
"Hey."
"What's happening?" I said getting to the point.
"I don't know. Should we get Gee back here?"
"Gee?" Who's he?
"Gee!!" he yelled. I covered my ears.He's loud.
That one guy who watched us in the dream came back with his hand over his eyes. "If you're naked again, I'm totally gonna kick your ass as sound as you get pants on" he said.
"I don't even wanna know." I said.
"It's safe, retard." ' Gerard ' said.
"I think we should start over new." I said.
"Good idea. I guess I should formally introduce myself then. Hi, I'm Frank and I play guitar in the band, My Chamical Romance."
"Ok then, hey, my name's Gerard," I looked at Frank then back to the real Gerard. "and I sing with my beautiful voice in the band, My Chamical Romance," he finished.
"And you are....?" asked Frank. ( it's nice to know his real name! )
"I, my good fellow," I said in my best brittish accent. "am Zandalee. I sing with my prettier-than-Gerard's-voice in the band After FX." We laughed and I grabbed both of their hands and led them back to the front of the bus.